Paul And Storm - Too Friggin' Hot lyrics

We were gonna write a song To sing on Bob and Tom About Mel Gibson' arrest for drunken driving And the funny word he used for breasts And the way he yelled about the Jews The song was gonna have lots of rhymes and clever wordplay But it's too friggin' hot It's just too friggin' hot We tried really hard But you can't be funny When it's ten thousand degrees And your bu*t cheeks are welded together We were gonna write another thing About Lance Ba** from N*SYNC And the way that he came out of the closet And we'd point out the irony of the thousands of females Who dreamed that one day he just might be their husband And we'd probably find a word that rhymes with “Ba**” Relating to his h*mos**uality But it's too friggin' hot It's just too friggin' hot We tried really hard But you can't be funny When the thermometer's exploded And the cat is begging you to shave him The bridge was gonna be about Tom And how he hates to go out in the sun Something about a Scooby Doo pillowcase Zinc oxide and a trowel We were gonna write a third verse But it's too friggin' hot It's just too friggin' hot We tried really hard But you can't be funny When you're sweating like Nixon Your underwear's melting You could cook French fries Inside your armpits If Bob won't go golfing It's just too friggin' hot