Patfan - The Markiplier Rap lyrics

[Intro] Hello everybody! My name is Markiplier-! What is that? (x12) HOLY BALLS! [Verse 1] Who's a youtube star we all admire? A drunken miner, who just retired! To become a part-time chef plus a diver Hark the herald, It's Markiplier! A friend of Slender, and a star designer! But he's not a doctor you'd want to hire! A gravitational law-defier! He taught a gosh darn shark to fly, word! Like a bird, he'll drop a sky turd! Amnesia- he forgot a lighter! Mark's a guy who's one tough survivor! But he'll run and hide because he's not a fighter! Who's your daddy? Markiplier! An awesome father- Not what I heard! He met a hot ghost and tried to wife her! Also, he's an awful biker Who likes to ride over sharpened items! Not like it was hard to find'em! Sexy Mark can fill your heart's desires! He'll pick up chicks, and drop one-liners! He's so hot his hair could start a fire! Don't be shocked, if Mark is tired Like a guard who worked for five long all-nighters! He;s on the clock, someone start the timer! Was that Foxy? Hope he's not a biter! Nevermind, it was just Darkiplier! Not gonna lie, it's hard to rhyme words When you got a name like Markiplier! His Draw My Life had us all inspired! I teared up and I'm not a crier! I would rather light my farts on fire Than ever stop watching Markiplier! That was weird, I'm gonna stop right there! I'll sing the chorus while I dye my hair! [Chorus] You've shocked, you've scared, you've surprised! Just take us along for the ride! When you laugh we laugh And we've cried with you! When you crap your pants You know we do too! You're the man who's leading All of us down a dangerous road! Remember when you start screaming! That you will never scream alone! [Bridge 1] RED LIGHT! GREEN LIGHT! RED LIGHT! GREEN LIGHT! RED LIGHT! GREEN LIGHT! RED LIGHT! [Verse 2] Where'd he come from, where did he go? Nope, nope, nope, I'm so boned! Nothing wrong here, all fine and dandy! I'M THE KING OF FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY'S! Also known as the King of Squirrels! And he's always smooth when he talks to girls! Hey baby, just so you know All you gotta do is Press B to Blow! Watch your back for the crazed bu*t-stabber! I'm so brave! That doesn't matter! Punch him straight in the Gabba Gabba! Gotta go fast, go faster faster! How did his feet get spun around backwards? Why is he covered in pancake batter? Stand up, put your hands up! If you're a fan of staring at bananas! Boo! Jumpscares galore! Don't break your chair and end up on the floor! You do you And I'll do me! And we won't do each other... Probably... Having fun? I was starting to! Till it became a dick-punching party dude! Hosted by the one and only Markimoo! What'd you eat? That's a lot of poo! [Chorus] You've shocked, you've scared, you've surprised! Just take us along for the ride! When you laugh we laugh And we've cried with you! When you crap your pants You know we do too! You're the man who's leading All of us down a dangerous road! Remember when you start screaming! That you will never scream alone! [Bridge 2] Oh you're so weird. So weird You're you're so weird! Oh you're so weird. So weird You're you're so weird! [Verse 3] Here's a look, far from weird! Pink mustache, zero beard! See this man, you'd best steer clear! Sources say he should be feared! He don't take no sh** from nobody! If you mess with him you're gonna get bloody! Oh no! He's dead! Wilford Warfstache knows what's best! Markiplier's kinda like Slim Shady! He's got a lot of faces, all of them are crazy! They'll make you laugh! They'll make you cry! I will see you! In the next video! Bye-Bye! [Chorus] You've shocked, you've scared, you've surprised! Just take us along for the ride! When you laugh we laugh And we've cried with you! When you crap your pants You know we do too! You're the man who's leading All of us down a dangerous road! Remember when you start screaming! That you will never scream alone! YEA-HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! [Mark's Goofy Goober Song]