Ogden Nash - Invocation lyrics

(SMOOT PLANS TARIFF BAN ON IMPROPER BOOKS - News Item) Senator Smoot (Republican, Ut.) Is planning a ban on smut. Oh rooti-ti-toot for Smoot of Ut. And his reverend occiput. Smite, Smoot, smite for Ut., Grit your molars and do your dut., Gird up your l__ns, Smite h_p and th_gh, We'll all be Kansas By and by. Smite, Smoot, for the Watch and Ward, For Hiram Johnson and Henry Ford, For Bishop Cannon and John D., Junior, For ex-Gov. Pinchot of Pennsylvunia, For John S. Sumner and Elder Hays And possibly Edward L. Bernays, For Orville Poland and Ella Boole, For Mother Machree and the Shelton pool. When smut's to be smitten Smoot will smite For G-d, for country, And Fahrenheit. Senator Smoot is an institute Not to be bribed with pelf; He guards our homes from erotic tomes By reading them all himself. Smite, Smoot, smite for Ut., They're smuggling smut from Balt. to bu*te! Strongest and sternest Of your s_x Scatter the scoundrels From Can. to Mex! Smite, Smoot, for Smedley Butler, For any good man by the name of Cutler, Smite for the W.C.T.U, For Rockne's team and for Leader's crew, For Florence Coolidge and Admiral Byrd, For Billy Sunday and John D., Third, For Grantland Rice and for Albie Booth, For the Woman's Auxiliary of Duluth, Smite, Smoot, Be rugged and rough, Smut if smitten Is front-page stuff.