Neel Kolhatkar - University lyrics

(On screen) My impression of university. Liberal studies: I couldn't get into law so I had to settle for this. Medical science: I couldn't get into medicine so I had to settle for this. Engineering: I saw a girl in a lecture once. Student politics: Improving student life. Ha, we just want to have a good résumé. Foreign lectures: Bong-bang-bing-bong-bow-wah. And you've got a test on that topic tomorrow. Everyone in a group a**ignment: I did so much more work than everyone else. Ski society: We don't care about skiing. We just want to get drunk and have s** with each other. Theatre/acting: Oh, I could've done finance but I'd rather pursue my lifelong ambition of acting. Ten years later: I should've done finance. Mature age students: Hey, tutor. Look at all this extra work that I did. Nursing/school work: Money is not an issue for me. Ten years later: I need money. Guys on campus: Every girl here is so hot. Girls on campus: Every guy here is so hot. Health science/nutrition: Oh, my god. They're even hotter in here. What law students say: You study art. That's wonderful. What they mean: Never speak to me again, you peasant. Business society: We don't care about business. We just want to get drunk and have s** with each other. All societies: We don't care about any of our societies. We just want to get drunk and have s** with each other. Ninety-nine percent of uni students: We don't care about uni. We just want to get drunk and have s** with each other. Religious societies: We need to get drunk and have s** with each other. International students from Europe or US: I just got bored of getting drunk and having s** with people in my country. International students from Asia: I don't get drunk or have s**. I work hard. Teaching: I can't wait to inspire the next generation. Ten years later: I hate kids. Law revue: Wow, that was really good. Every other revue: Wow, that was terrible. Dentistry: I didn't get into medicine so I had to settle for this. Pharmacy: I couldn't get into medicine so I had to settle for this. Commerce: I couldn't get into medicine so I had to settle for this. Asians and Indians not doing medicine: I couldn't get into medicine so I had to settle for this. SRC during elections: We're going to annoy everyone. Drama society: Don't be silly. We're not a cult. Science: I saw a girl in a lecture once. She was really fat and wearing a Zelda t-shirt. I think I'm in love. Political science: I didn't get into law so I had to settle for this. Physiology: I couldn't get into law so I had to settle for this. International studies: I couldn't get into law so I had to settle for this. Media: I couldn't get into law so I had to settle for this. Every white person not doing law: I couldn't get into law so I had to settle for this. Arts: (Smoking from a bong) Arts: (Holding a bong) I couldn't do anything so I had to settle for this. Communication degree: Am I supposed to learn anything in this degree? Professor of communication: (Holding a bong) I've got no idea. Colleges: (Holding alcoholic beverage) Let's get all the precious to s** our dicks. Liberal frontbench: Let's get Julie Bishop to s** our dicks. Information technology (IT): I really much enjoy information technology in India so I come to Australia to study it. Get it? Study it.