Naturalist - I Was Happy Here lyrics

I was happy here. As long as I can remember. Now I've disappeared, dissolved into fragments in the air Everyday I listen to songs that remind me I don't exist. It's comforting knowing that someday I might be missed. It makes it easier realizing that other people feel like this. I can't help but to think that this makes me sound selfish It's because I've lost my faith and it makes sense that I feel this way. It's because I don't pray and I've just run out of things to say. Or all the money I've saved that I blow to buy away the pain. I'm just finding something other than myself to put blame "It's all going to be okay" That's what my friends would say. I try to believe them but I'm just looking for an escape I will never learn to love myself. I just need someone to take care of And I still get my dinner at the gas station down the street, hoping I run into someone who loves me for being me. So I'll have another cigarette and pour another drink. Smoke away my loneliness and toast to better things. I know that this can't be the life that I lead, working from 9 to 5, stuck in traffic on I240. So, when I die and you bury me 6 feet in the grave, I want to be buried with all the mistakes that I've made and all the selfish things I say and all the times that I was fake. Make sure my gravestone reads "look at the mess, look at the mess he made."