You ain't Dolly And you ain't Porter She's a little bit fuller And you're a whole lot shorter Let's dance all night And fill the jukebox full of quarters Cause you ain't Dolly No, and you ain't Porter Well I noticed you right off the bat in those cowboy boots Who couldn't help but see you in that rhinestone suit That's cause I'm the reigning queen of karaoke night Well if I get drunk enough to sing, hell I just might Hey now, don't you worry cowboy, cause I'll get you through We'll sing a cheating song just like they used to do Cause you ain't Dolly And you ain't Porter She's a little bit fuller Yeah, but you're a whole lot shorter Let's drink all night And fill the jukebox full of quarters Cause you ain't Dolly And you ain't Porter You'll probably see me country singing on The Voice someday Yeah and I'm the guy they wrote about in 50 Shades of Grey Why don't you come on back to my place and you can have your way Well baby that sounds tempting, but I just can't stay Oh we won first prize cowboy, let's just split the dough Honey I will always love you, but we'll never know Cause you ain't Dolly And you ain't Porter She's a little bit fuller Yeah, and you're a whole lot shorter We danced all night and filled the jukebox full of quarters Cause you ain't Dolly And you ain't Porter, no No, you ain't Dolly And you ain't Porter