I want to know the day custodian I want to hear his harsh refrain But most of all I hear the calling of the watchman afterhours I want to be the night security I want to own a tiny TV With the sound turned down and no one around I'll sing so very loud I want to be the night security I want to sleep right in my clothes I want to open my eyes as people walk by And whisper, "Who's that guy?" My keychain is on the table Its ma**ive size implies The scope of what I'm able To unlock any time I want to be the night security I want to sleep right in my clothes I want to open my eyes as people walk by And whisper, "Who's that guy?"