Margaret Cho - In Transition, "Rollin' In Da Beef" (Webisode 2) lyrics

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Margaret Cho - In Transition, "Rollin' In Da Beef" (Webisode 2) lyrics

INT. MARLA STEVENS' OFFICE - DAY The sound of a toilet flushing. Coming through a door, adjusting her skirt. MARLA STEVENS enters her impeccable office. Her intercom interrupts. MALE ASSISTANT Ms. Stevens, your financial advisor is on the line - do you want me to go ahead and put that through? MARLA Well, for Christ's sakes, yeah put him through. I'm always in for somebody when it has to do with my money; or don't you wanna get paid? MALE ASSISTANT Umm... yes, I mean... MARLA It's a simple question. Do you want to get paid weekly? Or are you an intern? MALE ASSISTANT Do you want me to put the call through first or do you want me to answer your question? MARLA Oh my god, this isn't Cash Cab! Yes, put the call through. MALE ASSISTANT Sorry, I'm gonna put the call through. That's what I'm gonna do - I'm gonna put the call through right now. She leafs through a stack of memos on her desk. Suddenly, another voice rings through. Cut to split screen: BARRY SCHWARTZ is on the line. BARRY (V.O.) Marla? MARLA This is Ms. Stevens... Barry, I appreciate the fact that you think that we know each other well enough to be on a first name basis. Where the f** did manners go? I get paid to be on television to teach people how to live well and stylishly and this is what I get? BARRY (V.O.) I'm terribly sorry, Ms. Stevens. I just wanted to let you know that Star magazine has contacted my office regarding your... MARLA Are you asking me permission to do an interview for Star magazine? BARRY (V.O.) No. No. I'm just letting you know that they're really knocking down the doors. MARLA Barry, I'm putting this whole little prison incident behind me. A short 2 year sabbatical. Unless you're talking to me about OK Magazine... then shut the f** up and get back to work making me millions off my collection of hand-painted tablecloths. Ya got it? BARRY You got it. MARLA Good. Go. BARRY Thank you, h-have a good day. She hangs up the phone angrily. EXT. APARTMENT - EVENING Tawny, Farhonda and Concha sit around a table TAWNY Damn, this transitional living sh** is not for me. When I get my money I'm gonna get me a high rise, with a jacuzzi tub, and a real nice king-size bed with a “duvette”. FARHONDA Ooh, I wanna live with you. TAWNY Get yo own place. I'ma have a TV in the bathroom, and a phone by the toilet. FARHONDA Ooh, I once got an eye infection when I used the phone by the toilet at a hotel in Vegas. I sued 'em. TAWNY b**h, have a phone, or don't have a phone, but please shut the f** up. The point is that when we get our money, we goin' be rollin' in the beef. (singing) rollin' in the beef. FARHONDA No you mean rollin' in the deep... TAWNY No I'm talkin' 'bout rollin' in the beef. Like prime ribs. Tawny finally cracks a smile, and it's no wonder she hides them teeth. They f**ed up! TAWNY (CONT'D) Yeah when Marla Stevens cough up our green, we are gonna be rollin' in da beef. Whooo it's gonna be good! I have been waiting patiently - I lived my life in prison. And that b**h, she gonna pay us in full CONCHA And you know what? No personal checks, this is a full-cash money transaction only. Concha sneaks out a cheap bottle of wine and pours a toast for them in three plastic cups. FARHONDA Wait, how you get this in here? CONCHA Don't worry about it, alright. Do you want it or not? FARHONDA Hell yeah! CONCHA Alright then. Here's to money in the bank FARHONDA And fishes in the tank. TAWNY And if you don't raise yo gla**, yo mama p**y stank! They touch plastic cups and take swigs! FADE OUT

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