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i no longer drink but i'm an alcoholic which means there is no longer a constant stream of alcohol going through my blood ensuring that another human can't grow healthily inside of me i don't sh** blood anymore recently i barely sh** the sh** builds inside of me causing me to burp & feel nauseous & take laxatives & feel warm & act b**hy & pee often which are all symptoms of being pregnant every time i've taken a pregnancy test i've been wasted in the company of another wasted person currently i'm neither i am thinking about the term “wasted” what i am is lying in my bed where i've been for the past two hours craving xanax unable to tell a boy who “loves me” what is going on because i suspect he loves the idea of me not the actual me who burps & sh**s