Lauryn Hill - Retrospect for Life lyrics

[Intro] Yo, we gotta start respectin' life more y'all You look at your brother man you gotta see yourself Gotta see the God within him We brothers gettin' changed real quick over nothin' We losin' too many of ours Gotta recreate y'all Yo, check it [Verse 1] Knowin' you the best part of life, do I have the right to take yours? Cause I created you, irresponsibly Subconciously knowin' the act I was a part of The start of somethin', I'm not ready to bring into the world Had myself believin' I was sterile I look into mother's stomach, wonder if you are a boy or a girl Turnin' this woman's womb into a tomb But she and I agree, a seed we don't need You would've been much more than a mouth to feed But someone, I would've fed this information I read To someone, my life for you I woulda had to leave Instead I lead you to d**h I'm sorry for takin' your first breath, first step, and first cry But I wasn't prepared mentally nor financially Havin' a child shouldn't have to bring out the man in me Plus I wanted you to be raised within a family I don't wanna, go through the drama of havin a baby's momma Weekend visits and buyin' J's ain't gon' make me a father For a while bearing a child is somethin' I never wanted to do For me to live forever I can only do that through you Nerve I got to talk about them n***as with a gun Must have really thought I was God to take the life of my son I could have sacrificed goin' out To think my homies who did it I used to joke about, from now on I'ma use self control instead of birth control Cause 315 dollars ain't worth your soul 315 dollars ain't worth your soul 315 dollars ain't worth it [Hook - Lauryn Hill] I never dreamed you'd leave in summer You said you would be here when it rained Why didn't you stay [Verse 2] Seeing you as a present and a gift in itself You had our child in you, I probably never feel what you felt But you dealt with it like the strong black woman you are Through our trials and tribulations, child's elimination An integration of thoughts I feel about the situation Back and forth my feelings was pacin' Happy deep down but not joyed enough to have it But even that's a lie in less than two weeks, we was back at it Is this unprotected love or safe to say it's lust Bustin', more than the sweat in somebody you trust Or is it that we don't trust each other enough And believe, havin' this child'll make us have to stay together Girl I want you in my life cause you have made it better Thinkin' we all in love cause we can spend a day together We talkin' spendin' the rest of our lives It's too many black women that can say they mothers, but can't say that they wives I wouldn't chose any other to mother my understanding But I want our parenthood to come from planning It's so much in my life that's undone We gotta see eye to eye, about family, before we can become one If you had decided to have it the situation I wouldn't run from But I'm walkin', findin' myself in my God So I can, discipline my son with my rod Not have a judge tellin' me how and when to raise my seed Though his d**h was at our greed, with no one else to blame I had a book of African names, case our minds changed You say your period hasn't came, and lately I've been sleepy So quit smokin' the weed and the beadies and let's have this boy [Hook x2]