Kenny Price - The Heavyweight lyrics

So I stepped up for the weighin' I knew the scales were wrong Cause you know how them d**tore scales get stepped on all day long A little fortune card came out it bears upon my mind There was no fortune all it said but just one at a time Because when I'm a heavyweight I'm fine when I'm fine I got a suit for every weight up to size fifty-nine I always wanted to waterski I finally got up this year Two iron boards and toe chain and I came right out of there People wonder how I laugh at things that make 'em frown And how I keep my double chin from a draggin' on the ground I guess the folks are curious ask where I get to drive But I can go to distance with any girl alive Because honey I'm a heavyweight I'm fine if you are mine You won't get cold in the winter and I'm a shade in summertime One gets lonely two's companions three's a crowd they say But I won't fuss if you bring the bus and load the darlings by today Someday I'll have to hangin' up and underfeet the heavyweight I'll never make the weighin' for a million dollare gate I'm a s**in' it to you puny lads you better stay out of my way And maybe next year you might be able to prove a little weigh your way Cause when I'm a heavyweight I was fine sixty-nine And that's not my suit size buddy just the year I left behind But when they try to put me down six feet under the ground There ain't no way to cover up the round mound of sound No there ain't no way to cover up the round mound of sound