Excuse me...may I have your attention? Ken Kaniff Shut the f** up! Little b**h Will the real Ken Kaniff please sit the f** down? Yo [Verse 1] The real Ken is back and that's me The other Ken Kaniff the one that starts with an "E"? He ain't OG he's kind of Shady and Slim Severing ties with me because I had a baby with Kim And Dawn, her twin sister, yo I f**ed her too And she s**ed Dean's dick dog and that's the truth And she only got one tooth and that's no lie I think he k**ed Dawn in the song Bonny and Clide But yo, that's go about the Slim Shady LP And see that track twelve was performed by me But I ain't crying about it yo cause I'm telling the truth I'm cool with Eminem, my bad, his real name's "Bruce" Now you know that sorry I ought to burst your bubble But this whole song's going to get my a** in trouble I'm a codependent schizophrenic white boy too I ain't dyed my hair cause Karen told me too [Hook] Ken Kaniff Dot com is something to drop bombs on the World Wide Web Basically because I'm Ken Kaniff For the children doing it for the kids Because the average age of my fanbase is six Ken Kaniff With a dick that's hung like a horse The same pricks that are the main reason for your cousin's divorce Ken Kaniff With a knave doves sacks and dimes on the World Wide Web Basically cause I'm Ken Kaniff [Verse 2] Alright an ace barb verse and what's worse? Every other f**ing word will be another f**ing curse Cause this ain't for the radio, I made this sh** for Napster For hacker ba*tards and the Internet masters I used to be signed to Web But money don't make you happy and fame f**s with your head But look: Sony five-fifty is just shifty My girlfriend strokes me better than those sissies And she can tell you that Kaniff is crazed Well-endowed and proud to be stuck in his ways Hey, whatever happened to Royce da 5'9"? I think he got dropped from Tommy Boy before he got signed I guess Bad met Evil and he lost his mind Him and Far Eyes should take time to write some rhymes And that Aristotle guy is kind of nice with his I'll let him spit the next verse and ride on these kids [Repeat hook] [Verse 3] Listen to me Spit while you talk and piss on a tree I'll mentioned to be asleep while the mission's complete Release the hounds out on Dr. Dre And find his arm and his legs about a block away From each other Cause when you die you're going to hell Your most recent tracks bang cause they're made by Mel And if it ain't a sample, well, then the sh** won't sell You'll have Markey and Jeffrey play the drums and bells As for me and these tracks? Yo, we made it from scratch There ain't no "chikka chikka", yo, cause that sh** sounds wack Bring it back don't rap about crack cause that's sketchy I ain't got to hold my nose to make my voice sound catchy I just got to be me and y'all see From Ken Kaniff to Aristot- and -L.E And pretty much there ain't nothing else to say I'm a selfish patient who needs help today! [Repeat hook]