Julien Baker - Decorated Lawns lyrics

[Verse 1] Went back home in the winter Moved into my parents' house And walked the hallways like a stranger Still haven't figured anything out [Verse 2] ‘Cause I still don't know what to do Last year, I swore I'd make a noose In the lights, hey now I'm the daughter that could ring my neck With the colored bulbs So that everyone would laugh at me Laugh at me Laugh at me When you drive around the neighborhood in your SUV Looking for a holiday display with your family And there I'll be, in the yard, dangling [Verse 3] Happier spending December Fulfilling obligations Without the red pin in my calendar Or the last call at the Greyhound station [Verse 4] ‘Cause I can't hurry up to you At the end of every grueling day And for the mundanity we suffer through I won't try to join the pile up on the freeway Crash my car into a ditch, oh darling I won't even think of it… anymore [Chorus] ‘Cause I loved you I loved you I loved you More than I hate me I hate me I hate me [Chorus] I loved you I loved you I loved you More than I hate me I hate me I hate me [Chorus] I loved you I loved you I loved you More than I hate me I hate me I hate me [Chorus] I loved you I loved you I loved you More than I hate me I hate me I hate me