Incredibad - I Think I Might Have k**ed The President lyrics

It all started last week when I went on a date She was beautiful, blonde hair, I picked her up at 8 I decided to take her to a magic show My mom said I shouldn't, but what does she know? "A lobster for my lady friend, cooked extra nice And some amaretto afterward would be just right Thank you, garcon, this is gonna be magnificent Oh, the lights went down, time for the entertainment" The magician took the stage and sawed a lady in half I could see her legs, so fake, made me laugh! Then they asked for a volunteer from the audience I hid my face - no way, leave me out of it! Next thing I know, my girl is volunteering for me She tells me she thinks "Men on stage are really s**y!" So I play along, and go up on stage Hoping the stunt will get me...You know! So now they want to hypnotize me They'll ring a bell, and I'll cluck like a turkey I say "Yeah right! Do your best! This whole thing's faker than Pam Anderson's chest!" Big laugh from the audience, they loved that joke Then appeared the hypnotist in a cloud of smoke "At the count of three and the sound of a bell You'll close your eyes and be under my spell" "Ready, here we go, one, two, three, ding!" I opened my eyes and...Nothing! But wherever I looked, the crowd wouldn't stop laughing What had I done to elicit this reaction? Now hold on, y'all, this is the beginning of our story And I promise later on, it's gonna get gory So parents, grab your kids, and tuck them off into bed Cause I think I might have k**ed the President! One week later, I haven't seen the girl since And I get to school and we're having a field trip "Cla** participation is a must" The sign said "Washington, D.C. or bust" First thing on the agenda, the reflecting pool And it made me remember that America's pretty cool Then off to the White House for a special tour Our guide was very knowledgeable in American folklore She told us about Lincoln and George Washington And even let us go into the room they smoke pipes in "Time to go downstairs!" she called the elevator up It arrived, I heard a DING! I felt my eyes shut I awoke on the floor, the walls felt all curvy I was soaking wet, and my stomach topsy-turvy I was covered in blood, holding a knife - I dropped it I looked around, I was in the Oval Office! What had I done? I couldn't remember a thing! But then some memories came back to me I remember finding the President and stabbing him in the neck Then cutting him into little pieces and stuffing him in his desk Oh me! Oh my! I didn't mean to! It must have been that hypnotist and his evil voodoo! Now some things are bad, like not paying your rent But I think I might have k**ed the President! Well, it's been a year now since that fateful event I framed a hobo to take the cops off my scent And every time I hear a bell I stab someone in the face But besides that I'd say that everything is going great! Please learn from my story, don't be a fool And never let a Communist hypnotize you Or you might...k** the President! Out!