In Fear and Faith - Bought the Ticket, Took the Ride lyrics

So you think that I, Should I be a man free of sin? I've done enough to prove, That I am not capable of this! I'm not claiming that I'm all that bad, But I'm not surprised I've created distance from my past Three-Hundred-And-Sixty-Five days ago! I was a different man! Watch my world caught on fire! There has been a slight change of plan! More liquor was poured, Found out love is for who*es! White powder, allowed bad ideas to form! All of this is consequence, this year could be my last! Maybe I am crazy, (How about a taste of my own private hell?) But either way I am, Okay, I'm alive today! (One day you'll know the pain I feel!) But it won't take away this pain. One day I'm expecting to pay for The things I've done in this life. I've tried to take my time, But it never turns out right. I know it's just a matter of time... If only all of you, Could see into my mind! Then you would probably find A boy who's barely clinging to life! Maybe I am crazy, (I bought the ticket and I took the ride!) But either way I am, Okay, I'm alive today! (I wouldn't trade it for anyone's life!) But it won't take away this pain.