Howard Ashman - Gaston lyrics

[Spoken Intro] Gaston: Who does she think she is? That girl has tangled with the wrong man! No one says "No" to Gaston! LeFou: Darn right! Gaston: Dismissed! Rejected! Publically humiliated! Why, it's more than I can bear. LeFou: More beer? Gaston: What for? Nothing helps, I'm disgraced LeFou: Who you? Never! Gaston, you've got to pull yourself together LeFou: Gosh, it disturbs me to see you Gaston Looking so down in the dumps Every guy here'd like to be you, Gaston Even when taking your lumps There's no man in town as admired as you You're everyone's favorite guy Everyone's awed and inspired by you And it's not very hard to see why No one's slick as Gaston No one's quick as Gaston No one's neck's as incredibly thick as Gaston's For there's no man in town half as manly Perfect, a pure paragon! You can ask any Tom, Dick, or Stanley And they'll tell you whose team they prefer to be on! LeFou and Chorus: No one's been like Gaston A king pin like Gaston LeFou: No one's got a swell cleft in his chin like Gaston Gaston: As a specimen, yes, I'm intimidating! LeFou and Chorus: My what a guy, that Gaston! Give five "hurrahs!" Give twelve "hip-hips!" LeFou: Gaston is the best and the rest is all drips! Chorus: No one fights like Gaston Douses lights like Gaston In a wrestling match nobody bites like Gaston Bimbettes: For there's no one as burly and brawny Gaston: As you see, I've got biceps to spare LeFou: Not a bit of him scraggly or scrawny Gaston: That's right! And every last inch of me's covered with hair Chorus: No one hits like Gaston Matches wits like Gaston LeFou: In a spitting match nobody spits like Gaston Gaston: I'm especially good at expectorating! Ptooie! Chorus: Ten points for Gaston! Gaston: When I was a lad I ate four dozen eggs Every morning to help me get large And now that I'm grown I eat five dozen eggs So I'm roughly the size of a barge! Chorus: No one shoots like Gaston Makes those beauts like Gaston LeFou: Then goes tromping around wearing boots like Gaston Gaston: I use antlers in all of my decorating! Chorus: My, what a guy, Gaston!