Hopsin - Heather Nicole lyrics

At night in my window I see a silhouette Crying heavy tears look how wet my pillow gets Throughout my days I don't smile I just get upset And since you left look at all the sh** that it affects I take a picture of your face and I just hold it up Kiss it, then reminisce on when it was both of us It's hard for me to open up, I'm always talking to myself But to nobody else Some say that church or maybe counseling could probably help But they don't know about all of my idiotic lies All the f**ing times I left you traumatized Swore up and down to you saying I'm a try And never did, I try not to cry but I feel bad I didn't apologize It's time I cough it up and tell more, my soul is taken never sell yours I did some sh** I probably coulda been in jail for Bury me deep inside hells core And don't let me out until you hear bells roar She said, you never loved me You just controlled me If you f** around I'm calling the police But all I wanted to say was I'm sorry Oh how I wish that could tell you You're gone, you're dead, you'll never know that I was sorry Just leave me alone, stay out my head, I wish that I could tell you You're gone, you're dead, you'll never know that I was sorry Just leave me alone, stay out my head, I wish that I could tell you It's hard to forget, my heart is a brick I tell myself Marcus, I thought that you were smarter than this The mess I put you through was worse than pearl harbor and sh** I'd always harm you and flip, mentally scar you and trip Sometimes I'd argue and get, the nerve to call you a b**h Then bruise your back against the dresser that I tossed you against My Juliet at the time I never thought you was it I do now but sh** your gone, so I just offer you this A song to you, through it I open the crack in my chest And show the whole world I've always had a lack of respect For women who went to my life, I look to vengeance as knife Intentions to fight, if you thinking I was senseless you right Now every sentence I write, I think twice on it so I don't regret Cause only stress lies in a simple mind of loneliness I'm an unholy mess, put me in a hole to rest Welcome to my life this is how painful my stories get She said, you never loved me You just controlled me If you f** around I'm calling the police But all I wanted to say was I'm sorry Oh how I wish that could tell you You're gone, you're dead, you'll never know that I was sorry Just leave me alone, stay out my head, I wish that I could tell you You're gone, you're dead, you'll never know that I was sorry Just leave me alone, stay out my head, I wish that I could tell you Now use this track as a lesson All you guys out there who have some aggression Towards your woman it don't have to get hectic That crap is pathetic, now look at me I have to regret it I can't go near her or nothing, she'll probably have me arrested The only thing I could do is just make a track with a message And hope she hears it so she could know I was badly infected I never meant to be that type of guy But I realized that I was, and because of it I'm throwing my sinister life aside I can cry at any moment just thinking about it Sometimes I hide it from the folks that I'm hanging around with I should apply for a new soul cause I think it's invalid Somebody told me when I die I'll be safe but I doubt it The grudge she holds against me, it hurts me so severely She won't come near me, I thought that time was supposed to cure me I'm so alone and weary, writing songs to heal me I swear that I'm sorry Heather, I mean it so sincerely She said, you never loved me You just controlled me If you f** around I'm calling the police But all I wanted to say was I'm sorry Oh how I wish that could tell you You're gone, you're dead, you'll never know that I was sorry Just leave me alone, stay out my head, I wish that I could tell you You're gone, you're dead, you'll never know that I was sorry Just leave me alone, stay out my head, I wish that I could tell you