Hank Green - My Phone lyrics

I didn't think it was for real Or it could be such a big deal That this hunk of silicon could save my life But now I've seen what it can do And after all that we've been through I had to write a song all about why It can do anything It can even help me sing And, yes, it helped me find my soul mate It can be a light saber Or help me find out if my neighbor Is a registered s** offender in my state Been bitten by a vampire bat? Well, there's an app for that Been deployed into heavy combat? Well, there's an app for that! In a fight with Ya**er Arafat? Well there's an app for that Have you heard about my phone My phone's so sweet My phone owns your phone It makes my life complete One thing you gotta understand My phone it holds my hand and I don't think you could comprehend how I don't even need a girlfriend now 'Cause my phone does everything If I put it in my pants Suddenly, I can dance And the ladies flock to me on the dance floor And the one that I take home Invariably loves my phone Too bad there's not an app for birth control Are you bored at the laundromat? Well there's an app for that Been feeling like you're getting fat? Well there's an app for that Forgetting when to feed your cat? There's an app for that Have you heard about my phone My phone's so sweet My phone owns your phone It makes my life complete One thing you gotta understand My phone it holds my hand and I don't think you could comprehend how I don't even need a girlfriend now 'Cause my phone does everything My finance application Says I deserve a vacation And it solved the economy in Greece Stevie jobs knows what he's doin In my opinion he's a shoe-in For this year's Nobel prize for peace You learning how to knit a hat? Well there's an app for that Your wife just gave birth to a cat? There's probably an app for that You want to call your mom and chat? Well, actually service is pretty spotty out here, so I'll I'll just call her when I get into town... Have you heard about my phone My phone's so sweet My phone owns your phone It makes my life complete One thing you gotta understand My phone it holds my hand and I don't think you could comprehend how I don't even need a girlfriend now 'Cause my phone does everything And yes, I mean everything