Grind Time Now - The Saurus vs Dirtbag Dan lyrics

[Round 1: Dirtbag Dan] All right! All you battle rap geeks are gonna hate what I do to Pete 'Cause I've committed some robberies in the past, but I'm about to paint my masterpiece See, in the Bay, you would've been another victim You're tripping if you think I ain't f**ing with him Of course he's the King of the Dot: his face is f**ing covered with 'em! This chubby f** put on 50-plus, and act like we ain't noticed it I'll bet you get pissed when trying on fits like triple-X is supposed to fit Just look at his neck! I'm willing to bet he's never had s** with a sober b**h! Someone tell Monterey Liotta here his battle reign is OVER with! Your performance is pathetic, hard to watch at best If he starts to grab his chest, it's probably cardiac arrest I guess the thing I find ironic is Pete knows every song on BuyProduct Like weedheads know every word to every verse from "5 On It"! Now, I know worse cats on tracks than The Saurus, who roll with DJs that stop short Unfortunately for Pete, I mean actual cats and DJs that scratch - on chalkboards! Now, I'm glad we're in Toronto I don't care if you got more fame here, b**h fu*k YOU, and the sixteen-year-old girl you came here with! [Round 1: The Saurus] Yo! Hold up! Hold up! Yo, he tried to diss my lady That makes this battle even easier 'Cause I'm surprised that YOU'RE allowed within 500 feet of her! Yo! Yo! Now, I ain't a standoffish person, but I am always first to swing So, fans, watch this manslaughter: Dan's gotta learn some things Now, either Sasquatch is lurking, and he can't stop from surfacing Or this f*g robbed the mask off the mascot from Burger King! Now, he's 9 and 1 in Grind Time, but don't let the record deceive you 'Cause 90 percent of heads can tell that everyone's beat you You're a level beneath me, I top an elite cla** And to this point, friendship's got you a free pa**! These unnecessary overtimes are happening so frequent Every time he gets a match with someone decent It's like Dan and every judge have a contractual agreement! Wait, I have a f**ing secret Nobody respects a giant beard: we're only laughing at the f*ggot underneath it! And since your teens, you've been the weakest piece of everything I think I've seen That's why it's hard distinguishing what you're the missing link between! See, how can he be part of a progressive movement When you look like every dude on the Scale of Evolution - EXCEPT THE HUMAN!? [Round 2: Dirtbag Dan] How the f** am I supposed to respect your face!? I wish you were a m**m b**h, so as a test of faith, you had to wear garments to protect your face I wanna wreck your face! Stated in terms you could best relate: "I'll turn this to a scene for the police to come investigate!" Your f**ing face flag's purple like Dipset How the f** do you get your dick wet When you got a pig neck, and your skin tone is fishnet!? Just ask how your cheeks look: very bad! Children are scared, women stare and laugh One look at his mug, it's apparent that he took a blast from some Planet Terror gas! Someone in the back's like, "That's so sad!" Come on, everybody, don't feel so bad He still gets checks from Nickelodeon's GUTS 'cause they used his face to model the Aggro Crag! This f**ing CREEP likes to watch kids EAT and imagine how their lunch taste You made the Monterey Bay Aquarium newsletter's front page for having a SquareBob sponge face! Those craters were shaped by eight missiles You got cheeks that scream, "I take crystal!" Plus, I bet you stick your head out the window of a moving car and your f**ing face WHISTLES! [Round 2: The Saurus] That's cool, that's cool The original approach was tight Yo! Yo! You can go ahead and call me SpongeBob, but, homie, I'm convinced for sure That your face makes you so insecure you gotta hide it with an inch of fur! sh**, I'm surprised you didn't cut it: that's your cheapest winning tactic! Plus, when you shave, you look like a completely different f*ggot! Now, I'm one in half a dozen who've made battling a business You're every dime-a-dozen f*g I hate about the battle scene's existence! I'm badgering the witness sh**, I might not know Spanish, but I know the difference between a Latin king and this b**h! Yo, you see, his culture has a language that he barely can speak So, I'll take shots at the Latino you're embarra**ed to be This is not the little mijo that his parents conceived You're like the opposite of Miklo from American Me! Motherf**er, I got two careers more lucrative than the one you have Today, I'm getting paid just for using you as a punching bag This f*ggot thinks that sipping water can make him an income 'Cause there's spare change in every cup he's taken a drink from! No, wait! Hold up! No, real talk - Dan just got engaged, and to propose, he decided to get his lady dinner Take her out, pay for drinks, get to see their favorite singer Then, while he's playing their song This dirty MOTHERfu*kER got down on one knee, and gave her finger an engagement ringworm [Round 3: Dirtbag Dan] I should just smash Pete and leave: run in, run out Miklo? That's not American Me! That's Blood In, Blood Out! Word is you let a p**n star sit on your tongue Now that sh** on your tongue has some sh** on its tongue! So, when he came to me for advice about music, since I'm a vet And I said, "Growth is the key, Pete.": not what I meant! You are now competing with T-Rex's head...for Most Offensive and Oddly Grotesque! Both are intense and ungodly at best PH's gums are then probably what's next! Dawg, I'm a threat, go for your neck This you could never take, bro, I'm the best Pete, if you hesitate, I'll make you levitate You know my resume: show me respect! Now, it's sad to say that Mac was right You couldn't double-time one line to save your life You paid the price when you tried to go against Johnny Peter got brave, then Peter got BODIED! For the record, that's how you double-time, slapdick! You try and act like a fat kid 'cause you've been eating off this rap sh** When the fact is you're a fat kid 'cause you eat a bunch of fat sh**! Ho-Hoes and cupcakes: THAT sh**! Get it straight! You need to get in shape! Hey, Liver-Face! Your nipples are the size and shape of dinner plates! Now, they will NOT play you a beat We are NOT playing with frees This is MY world, Pete! I'mma slay him with these If I was Mickey D's, I'd be paying you G's 'Cause you don't even need a mask to be Mayor McCheese! Cheah! [Round 3: The Saurus] Now hold up! Hold up! Now, before you get all hype, like the sh** he spit was hard I KNEW that you would pick that verse apart, which goes to show just how PREDICTABLE you are! So, while that might have been the best you ever did in your life, Dirt For me, it's just the tip of the iceberg Listen: I'm k**ing this lame in a million ways, and you really ain't able to say sh**! You flipping the rhythm, it's pitiful, man, 'cause your syllable game is too BASIC! Primitive cadence, versus the person who's surely considered the greatest I was winning the major tournaments while you were earning your minimum wages! Hold up! This is the way it's properly done, so you gotta come up with a better approach Or, honestly, son, I'll be the one that is probably gonna be getting the votes 'Cause everyone knows your terrible gimmicks don't carry your hold or credible image And whenever you win, you're just getting convicted of murders you never committed! Whoa! Whoa! So get in the back of the line! I made a RACK to lose to Illmac: that's double what you made in all ten of your battles COMBINED! I'm on the payroll with a pension plan You're on a free ride you only get because you're cool with all of the respected fam So what kind of message does it send the fans When ANY man with an attention span can see that you owe ALL your wins to friendship, Dan? [Promo OT: The Saurus] Hold up! I just finished this sh** today! It's tight! Yo! Now, he's in a crew called - (*laughs*) - "The Legion of Dudes" I know! I know, I had trouble believing it, too (*laughs*) Besides your beard, the only common ground between Jesus and you Is that, even when you think they're on your team, you still get beat by a Jew! Wait! Wait! Yo, half of these peeps are confused, like, "We already saw Jack Schitt battle in person." The other half KNOW who you are, and wanna lynch you for how badly you jerked him But you jerk EVERYONE, Dan! That's not something we can disregard! sh**, even Tiger Ty beat you with his bars...and he was a retard! Yo! Yo, check it! Now, there's London, there's Melbourne, Toronto makes it three International trips for battles this b**h has gotten, thanks to me! You ain't the chosen one, you homeless bum! The undercard can't overcome Knowing the fact that HE'S the opening act of every show we've done! Yo! So, you've come today to meet your f**ing maker I put Dirt in the ground like Mother Nature With a shovel made for digging up your grave, and putting Dirt in the ground: undertaker! Yo, on the flight here, I even pushed him out the plane with no darn parachute So, how'd you get to Canada? Did Soul Khan carry you? [Promo OT: Dirtbag Dan] I guess we know who get respect in T-Dot more Not Dan Martinez, but Peter Morris: the choice is yours You could've voted for this beautiful beard, and you voted for those open sores! This is a face that open doors! That one suggests that you nail them shut! Either to protect you from nuclear war, or just 'cause his pores are so f**ed up! A thesaurus is a book of synonyms Which is ironic, considering The word "thesaurus" is a synonym for facial skin disfigurement! I got some inside info: peep this Pete here's on some creep sh**! He got a pre-teen boyfriend out in Crete that he sleeps with on some "Greek" sh**! I mean, who else did you think he spent his summers lying on the beach with? What kind of chick would f** with a dude whose cheeks are the same texture as a peach pit!? Your f**ing FACE gives a whole new meaning to the term "seasick"! 'Cause anybody who's seen it immediately seemed sick EAT DICK and scrotum sack! f** holding back 'cause you're old and fat! Stick to folding jacks I told him, I just owned him - all I know is that! Life is filled with uncertainty, and in Pete's case, it's just as well 'Cause no matter where you are in time and space, the date on Pete's face is always 2012! It's the end of the world where your nose is, and I feel fine!