Eric Schwartz - Keep Your Jesus Off My Penis lyrics

CHORUS: Keep your Jesus off my penis Keep your bible off my balls Keep your prayers out of my ears And your crosses off my walls You can keep the virgin mother And the resurrection too Keep your Jesus off my penis Ill keep my penis offa you Well, Im frickin sick and tired Of turning on the news And seeing the religious rights ungodly fight To take our right to choose When to bear our children Who to love and how Education and protection, if were just practicing for now So W, look, obey a book If thats what works for you But I dont tell you how to pray So dont you tell me how to screw! CHORUS So youre screaming bloody murder about the Taliban regime For subjugating women and being too extreme And basing legislation on some ancient, holy book Does that sound a bit familiar? Heres a mirror, have a look! And as for the Ten Commandments, they need one more, at least Thou shalt never cover up the acts of pervert priests Now howd they let that happen Unless they just abhor us? Well, anyway, it adds another layer to the chorus! CHORUS So youll execute a person and then protect the single cell But mercy k** the terminally ill and youre going straight to Hell? Well, I dont know much about the word of God, far be it from me But I can tell you what it aint, thats hypo-Christianity Well, I am not anti-Christian, before you grab a rope There is beauty in religion And joy and love and hope And were all lookin for that answer Some colossal, cosmic cause But who the f** are you to turn your views into my laws? Its just believers in the bible that would have abortion banned Anti-choice agnostics, I could count em on one hand And as for k**ing babies, Ive got but one retort: If someone raped your daughter, George, youd beg her to abort And if some young girl from your church shows up with child or some infection 'cause you told her what a horrid sin it was to use protection Well, one day youll face the pearly gates And what you gonna say When that long-haired, Jewish peacenick sends your a** the other way Sayin keep your Jesus off my penis Keep your bible off my balls Keep your prayers out of my ears And your crosses off my walls Ive had it up to here with all the biblobile you spew So keep your Jesus off my penis Well, at least thats what I would do Yeah, keep your Jesus off my penis Ill keep my penis off of you Thats ifn you want me to