By eric clapton and martin sharp Twice upon a time in the valley of the tears An auctioneer is bidding for a box of fading years And the elephants are dancing on the graves of squealing mice. Anyone for tennis, wouldn't that be nice? And the ice creams are all melting on the streets of bloody beer While the beggars stain the pavements with flourescent christmas cheer And the bentley-driving guru is putting up his price. Anyone for tennis, wouldn't that be nice? And the prophets in the boutiques give out messages of hope With jingle bells and fairy tales and blind colliding scopes And you can tell they're all the same underneath the pretty lies. Anyone for tennis, wouldn't that be nice? The yellow buddhist monk is burning brightly at the zoo You can bring a bowl of rice and then a gla** of water too And fate is setting up the chessboard while d**h rolls out the dice. Anyone for tennis, wouldn't that be nice?