Epic Rap Battles of History - George Washington vs. William Wallace lyrics

George Washington There's a difference between you and me, Willy I fought till I was actually free, Willy I got my face on a quarter, you got drawn and quartered Tortured on the orders of a king, really? How'd you get beat by a dude named Longshanks? You hot dogged and he cut off your bean franks I'm money like a national bank, ain't nobody more street than Big G Stone face with a grill of sheep teeth, a Mel Gibson movie is your legacy I got a state and a day and a D.C, (Stroke) roll up in a boat (Stroke) You're sleeping, cut your throat (Stroke) I'll watch the blood flow, now who's got that Redcoat? William Wallace Look at you in your little blousy outfit Looking like a stiffer white dick than your monument I'll knock you the f** out, mate You died owning slaves, I died setting men free (Scot free) That's the highland way, this powdered prick couldn't beat me in a foot race I was emasculated, eviscerated I had my head chopped off and they put it on a pike But I still find time to bust a Gaelic rhyme I'll rip your Yankee Doodle arse on the mic I'll knock your face off your moolah, Alba gu bràth (Gu bràth) Hoorah (Hoorah) Founding Father, but no children Crossed the Delaware but your soldiers couldn't swim That's Washington, such a sh**e tactician The f**ing British Army didn't even want him I'm Wallace and I'm flawless Stay hidden in your office or suffer great losses I pop my kilt, strap my sword in my hilt Step on the battlefield and I'm ready to k** Send all your politicians straight down to hell The only Washington I trust; Denzel George Washington Is that the best you got for me? I'll chop down an MC like a cherry tree See, power, that's what the meaning of my flag is Your nation's famous for golf and haggis I'm fabulous from my head to my shoebuckle Step to me, and catch a knee to the mooseknuckle 'Cause I know you don't wear no draws I'm dressed like a pimp, best moves in at the ball McGlavin, McGliven, McSchool you all co*k block more Scots than Hadrian's Wall William Wallace I don't give a sh**e about your fancy clothes You whipped all those out of slave black folks Grew weed and you made hemp rope But if you think you'll beat me, you must be having a smoke No joke, don't tee off with me, laddie If you held my balls, you couldn't be my caddie My style's ice cold, yours is old and shabby You're the Father of Your Country, but I'm your daddy