Intro: (little girl) I, I wanna grow up toon Poppa Marshall, will you tell us a bed time story? (Eminem) Heeere we gooo Now once upon a time not long ago There was a little rapper about to blow But his album came and it was not good I think it went letter double pop a wood So the silly little fans they were mislead By a nerdy internet computer hip-hop head "Me and you clef we're gonna make some cash Grab the silver paint and let's paint my a**" Hey mister, would ya care ta bear witness ta The a**-whippin I'm about to administer To this a**-kissin little vaginal blista Stan-abis, little Marshall Mathers sista Annanis, corner, we have a mister Not havin it it's the machinista Dr. Evil with his bag of tricks for This little antagonist bag of dick-s**in Ex LL Cool Jay fan from Windsor I'm bout to murder little guinea f*g Anista You ba*tard, I ain't wanna have to diss ya Canabis, where the f** you at I miss ya Can-a-b**h oh can-a-b**h where for art thou can-a-b**h? Please tell me what happened with that style that you were rappin with? Can-a-b**h oh can-a-b**h are you from Los Angeles New York or just a janitor from Canada? Oh Can-a-b**h Now at first I ain't really understand this sh** Picture me for a second and imagine it Chillin in a bat man chair an relaxin When all a sudden some bullsh** comes across the scanner It's 'Can-a-b**h' or some Stan lives sh** They creep me out at first man this is sick But me being just a sick as conflict gets my dick harder than arithmetic And I know how you jealous ones envy I shoulda knew better from the first few letters you sent me The first two letters you were Tellin me sh** like you respect me like any other regular MC The third letter you ask How come I ain't return none of the messages at Shady Records you left me? The fourth Letter "Slim you really startin to upset me" The fifth letter told me you were comin to get me The sixth letter there's a bomb threat in our building This crazy mother f**er's really tryin to k** me So I went back and read the first few letters That said some sh** about a message you left Oh sh** that's not an "e" that's an "a" This dude wants to leave me a ma**age he's gay Right away I'm on the phone with Dr. Dre We got a bogey "Marshall I'm on the way" Can-a-b**h oh can-a-b**h where for art thou can-a-b**h? Please tell me what happened with that style that you were rappin with? Can-a-b**h oh can-a-b**h are you from Los Angeles New York or just a janitor from Canada? Oh Can-a-b**h So in two seconds flat Dre's at my crib Only thing is we both know where this kid lives And neither one of us have Canadian citizenship sh** oh Dre wait a mintue that's it All we gotta do is use a bit of turbo boost We can fly over the border "Let's go whoosh" So we're off to Toronto and we're gainin speed *Pfftt Arghh* What was that? Oh Jermaine Dupre f** It Keep goin no time to waste Wait backup hit him one more time in case (Okay) f** now he's draggin under the car Oh well only 30 more thousand miles Meanwhile me and Dre are tryin to conversate Just tryin to find a reason for the constant hatin And tryin to figure out what happened to Jermaine propaine "He couldn't have fell of that hard" ain't no way "What happened to the way you was rappin, When you was scandalous then Canabis turned into a television evangelist?" Plus he raps with his regular voice *Pft, pft, pft, pft* "What was that?" (Pet Shop Boys) So we pull up to the bridge where he last was spotted His corpse was still movin but his a** was rotted He kind of smelled a little like Courtney Love I figured if I stick him with a fork he's done So I stapped him twice kept jabbin christ He won't die this guy's like a battered wife He's like Kim he keeps comin back for more But he won't fight back I cracked his jaw Hold up Bis quit foldin up Punch me in the chest make my shoulders touch Do somethin at least one punch line C'mon till the meter reads 9-9-9-tey-nine percent of my fans are blonde Bis c'mon answer me man respond Tell me bout the sun, rain, moon and stars Intergalatic or metaphors from Mars Raw to the floor raw like Resovoir dogs Bite another line from Red Man's song Suddenly the stub of a dead man's arm from a midget Reaches out from under the car It's JD, this motherf**er won't die neither Dre starts sprayin him with cans of Ether *Sshhhh* We stomped the b**h and then stopmed the b**h again (Compton) Detroit b**h talk some sh** again Stomp him (switch feet) Stomp him (switch again) Dre alright he's dead dawg quit kickin him I think Stan-abis jumped off the bridge again (Arghhhhhh.....Damn!) He disappeared yo he's gone he did it again (Chorus)