[Verse 1] I'm sorry if I don't offer a proper congratulation But I just don't relate to celebrating procreation The planet is deteriorating rapidly, its a catastrophe The atrophy of our habitat is happening So where is our happily ever after? When does everybody sit back and enjoy laughter? The day won't come - it doesn't exist It's a fallacy, a myth - fabricated, full of sh** The American Dream of the 20th century It isn't my identity The only thing it's meant to me is that my endeavors Are scrutinized to the letter I'm chastised and misunderstood by people who never Even cared to do anything more than what they were told Who never think for themselves Who are caught up in the stranglehold Of school, work, and marriage, followed by a baby carriage The point of the story... let me offer some clarity You deserve to live your own life And not be a parody of American tradition Or biological predisposition to reproduce And what've you got to lose? Spend a few more years living your life to the fullest And maybe, someday, you'll see that you possibly dodged a bullet And then you'll be ready to bring life into the world Bestow your experiences and every lesson you've learned Because unhappy, aimless adults are often hopeless And I don't think kids are so oblivious not to notice I wrote this with good intention If you intend to lecture me, won't you follow my lead And get yourself a vasectomy