Dr Syntax - Careful What You Wish For lyrics

I like a hot girl that knows how to wipe her waist Especially the type that's giving me the time of day And let's me get up in her private space Greets me with a smilin' face I'll leave her feelin' like a woman Like Shania Twain Alright, okay, I've got you thinking, 'what a dick?' I bet he's quite the opposite and comes across a neurotic b**h Lackin' self confidence, is it that obvious? Well let's just say I praise the lord for alcoholic drinks One night my game was on fire like it was herpes Both the Fonze and Jon Travolta would've been like, 'we're not worthy' Despite having started early I wasn't slurrin' my words When I turned to a girl who was perfectly curvy I didn't come off pervy Flirty and risque perhaps But she was taken aback At times the self deprecating acts will get you crazy gash We danced to basement Jackson and guzzled drinks until our brains were mashed She invited me back to her flat I said, 'let's take a cab' She said, 'no, it's only down the road' So I said, 'go' We walked and talked I thought I'd scored Until we were walkin' with some other bloke Her cousin? No Her brother? No As far as introductions go, this one was coming slow A bit weird I thought, but f** it though Once we'd lumped it home, this man was straight in with no explanation My expectation was that I could rest her pale skin and privates, in private, with the lights dimmed To my excitement Things were moving on exactly to my liking I was riding, she was writhing It was beyond parental guidance Rated 18 and know what I mean? Excessive violence I was feelin' like the Don, putting my mac down Until I heard a creaking in the background 'What the f** was that?' He had sneaked in and stripped down, to a g-string And I would not agree to a threesome With deviants, it's just demeaning (Hell no) I don't want a geezer being as mean to me and a senorita Between the sheets Those are not the ingredients of a decent evening The rest of it's irrelevant Let's just say that my imperative was then, just leggin' it As if my life was threatened Now, I've met some odd people But those two just took the biscuit What they did to me was twisted And it's just not wicked You see, back in sixth form I was a chicken sh** dork All I wanted was a fit broad, with the morals of big who*e If there's one you can garner, from this self indulgent discourse Is that age old clique, just be careful what you wish for