Vanessa: Dad? Heinz Doofenshmirtz: Oh, hi, Vanessa! Vanessa: Dad, what are you doing? Heinz Doofenshmirtz: Well I'll be honest I don't really understand But I fell down this hill and I got glue on my hands Now I got records on my fingers Kids: Whaaaat? Heinz Doofenshmirtz: Records on my fingers I got records on my fingers and I just can't stop Kids: Don't stop Heinz Doofenshmirtz: I can't stop I got a platypus controlling me Kids: WHAAAAT? Heinz Doofenshmirtz: I got a platypus controlling me Now let me sum it up It was a strange set of circumstances Kids: Strange set of circumstances? Heinz Doofenshmirtz: I fell down the hill, I got glue on my hands now I got records on my fingers And I just can't stop Kids: DON'T STOP DON'T STOP Heinz Doofenshmirtz: Well I would if I was able There's a platypus controlling me he's underneath the table Kids: There's a platypus controlling him—WHAAAT? Kid: Oh I get it, platypus is a metaphor for whatever is keeping you down Kids: Corporations are a platypus The government's a platypus Your teacher is a platypus Weird Kid: My teacher is a panda Kids: Society's a platypus My parents are a platypus The media's a platypus It's all just propaganda We've all got platypus controlling us Heinz Doofenshmirtz: No just me Kids: We've all got platypus controlling us Heinz Doofenshmirtz: I'd stop if I was able Kids: We've all got platypus controlling us Heinz Doofenshmirtz: I'm not speaking metaphorically The platypus controlling me is underneath the table Oh wait, no, he's gone! Heyyy! There's no platypus controlling me... There's no platypus controlling me!