Dan Bull - Stroking A Cat lyrics

[Verse 1] This is not a subject many are approaching in rap Among the showboating and boasts, I know I'm so full of crap But I won't be complete without penning an ode to the fact That I feel most at home stroking a cat I feel his paws on my shoulder, so I turn and I'm poking him back He kneads my knees and I know he's cozy, The chap's hoping to doze in my lap It's fairly safe to say I'm open to that Because I'm most at home stroking a cat [Chorus] Jimmy I'm stroking a cat Sammy See him doze in my lap Patty There's few feelings closer than that I'm at home when I'm stroking a cat Behind the ears, now under the chin Tickle the tummy and feel the fluff on your skin [Verse 2] I had a cold heart but that frost was going to melt Because your fine fluffy fur was the softest thing I've felt Put me in contact with my lost and inner self But gosh, your droppings are the most obnoxious thing I've smelt If Jay Z had a baby With a crazy cat lady Their DNA would mutate to make me It may be crazy That I cradle cats in place of babies But you wouldn't make me change my behaviour if you paid me Maybe it's love, perhaps it's toxoplasmosis Honestly, I'm kind of shocked that I wrote this I'm too far gone, I'm lost and I'm hopeless Put a poster on the lamp post for me and hope someone will notice [Chorus] Jimmy I'm stroking a cat Sammy See him doze in my lap Patty There's few feelings closer than that I'm at home when I'm stroking a cat Behind the ears, now under the chin Tickle the tummy and feel the fluff on your skin [Verse 3] I try not to treat you anthropomorphically But damn, if you could talk to me That'd be awesome see I need to rea**ure you That I'll always be here for you Though we are mere mortal beings, I would run a mile for every single minute that I fear for you I'm no loyalist, but to me you are the real royal Developed and bred up as a vicious predator I found it tricky to picture, 'til you ripped that stick of feathers up You're like a teddy bear, but sentient with agency That's why I savour the sentiment you'd deign to play with me The wide world is dangerous home's a haven, sweet And if you need love enough I'm sure we have a vacancy [Chorus] Jimmy I'm stroking a cat Sammy See him doze in my lap Patty There's few feelings closer than that I'm at home when I'm stroking a cat Behind the ears, now under the chin Tickle the tummy and feel the fluff on your skin [Verse 4] Aside from mewling, I'll never get to hear you speak But we communicate in other ways enough to know you're unique The pet sanctuary was a feline Who's Who Perusing kittens like I was trying to get a new shoe I wonder what the factor was that made me choose you Don't know, perhaps you chose me and I just knew too You had a true cuteness I never grew used to It rips my heart apart knowing that soon I'll lose you [Ending] I don't want to lose you I love you