You know he never did marry, faith took all his energies Was a celibate preacher for thirty two good seasons At Hazelwood Hamlet's single room one and only house of worship in the trees She was a beauty of body in only fifteen years He made his lessons in virtue a little too clear On Sunday afternoons, off by themselves in the meadow just outside of town Did he misappropriate a kiss or was he really just a dedicated teacher? Before we can judge him, remember that we're all the same, ay, ay The details are fuzzy and that nothin's ever as it seems In the case of the wine soaked preacher She tried to fight her way to shore but never learned to swim Her lungs filled up with water, she eddied down the stream Face down, on up around the bend where that old current's at its worst And with the unborn baby of unknown sire There were two dead in the water, but really three died If you count the preacher's will but man, you gotta admit it sure did solve his problems Did he drown her in the river/or did she slip and did he really try to reach her? Was it a little more venom, a bit less grace? Or a lot more fire and a little less chaste? Well I don't know exactly what it was, but the sermons were never quite the same after that, I'll tell ya He died alone and anonymous, and that's a fitting fate For an undiscovered diddler, but a terrible waste Of an innocent man, and no one really knows for sure about that but him and he ain't talking Was he evil and a drunk or just another one of God's poor creatures? Did he misappropriate a kiss or was he really just a dedicated teacher? Did he drown her in the river/or did she slip and did he really try to reach her? Was he evil and a drunk or just another one of God's poor creatures? God's poor creatures Lacking features In the bleachers With we beseechers