Parody of Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer by Elmo & Patsy (R. Brook), Kris Publishing Co./Elmo Publishing (SESAC) New lyrics by Cledus T. Judd and Bruce Burch, La-Po Music (BMI)/Bruce Burch Publishing (SESAC) CHORUS Grandpa got runned over by a John Deere Walking home from the Moose Lodge Christmas Eve. Now you can say there's no such thing as Santa, But after suing John Deere, I believe... He'd been a-guzzlin' old Jack Daniels And smokin' that wacky weed- He mixed it with his medication And run off with some bleach-blonde named Bernice. When we found him Christmas mornin' We thought he had a heart attack. But he had tar prints on his forehead And incriminatin' hickies on his neck. (ON HIS WHAT???) CHORUS But we're all ashamed of Grandpa. He took Grandma's d**h too well. Started watchin' p**no movies And engaging in phone s** with Cousin Belle. It's a better Christmas without Grandpa Last year in church, he mooned the choir. At first, we thought it was Alzheimer's, But looking back, we realized he was wired. CHORUS Yeah, I filed myself a lawsuit And they awarded me two mil. You know Grandpa didn't leave me nuthin', But thanks to that old John Deere, he got k**ed. Funny, all my friends and neigh-bras Turned up on the grand jury, (laughs) I bribed 'em like Johnny Cochran Did when they set O.J. Simpson free. GUIL-TY!!! CHORUS (x2)