Christine Lavin - *69 lyrics

It used to be so easy To use the telephone You'd pick it and dial They'd answer if they were home Then the answering machine Helped us cut the cord Now callers could be screened Or better yet, ignored Then came call waiting We don't let that upset us Thought I have come to call call waiting 'chattus interruptus' But there's a brand new service Called *69 It redials the last person who called you And puts them back on the line There's call forwarding There's beepers Call conferencing and such A pan*lopy of choices Sometimes it's all too much You see, there was a sweet young girl So trusting, so naive You could tell her anything And she would believe She met a computer repairman His name was Jim And it was just a matter of time Before she truly cared for him Though he criss-crossed the country He'd see her when'er he could She grew to love him deeply Thought him kind, thought him good But there was one thing about him She considered a minor quirk He said he had no home phone She must contact him at work And it was his beeper number He instructed her to dial He'd always call her back so fast His haste would make her smile They carried on for months like this Until one rainy day She called him on the beeper He did not call back right away But when he did she heard background noises That made her suspicious Was that babies crying? Was that someone doing dishes? When they hung up she sat and pondered For quite some time Then with shaky hand She dialed *69 A woman answered the telephone The young girl asked for Jim Then quickly added 'Who is this?' The woman said 'I'm married to him' The conversation that followed Was the kind that men most dread The young girl told the wife everything Her husband ever said Or ever did, or bought, or promised her Then the wife had her say, too About their three young children How her income pulled them through They talked and cried, talked and laughed Now you could say he's in a bind All because the phone company has given us *69 Modern conveniences can help you But they can backfire If you are the kind of person Who is a liar In this global village It's best to tell the truth And beware if someone's courting you From a telephone booth Yes, in this global village Take this as a sign Remember that repairman And *69