Christine Lavin - Regretting What I Said to You When You Called Me 11:00 On a Friday Morning to Tell Me that at 1:00 Friday Afternoon You're Gonna Leave Your Office, Go Downstairs, Hail a Cab to Go Out to the Airport t lyrics

This song is called, "Regretting What I Said to You When You Called Me 11:00 On a Friday Morning to Tell Me that at 1:00 Friday Afternoon You're Gonna Leave Your Office, Go Downstairs, Hail a Cab to Go Out to the Airport to Catch a Plane to Go Skiing in the Alps for Two Weeks, Not that I Wanted to Go With You, I Wasn't Able to Leave Town, I'm Not a Very Good Skier, I Couldn't Expect You to Pay My Way, But After Going Out With You for Three Years I DON'T Like Surprises!!" And it's subtitled "A Musical Apology" In this song I attempt to take back everything I said while Standing in a phone booth on the corner of 49th and 3rd I didn't mean it when I said, "I hope The cable in the elevator snaps When you step on board" And I was joking when I said "I hope you crack your head And get mangled by the downstairs revolving doors" And I was kidding when I said, "I hope the Number 103 bus hits and makes a pancake out of you" I'm sorry I'm sorry Isn't it amazing what a woman in love will do? And I really don't want to see your taxi on the 59th street bridge Flip over And crash through the rail And I'd feel bad if at the airport you were Mistaken for a local s** offender Arrested, beaten up, and thrown in jail And I really don't want to see you getting radiation poisoning From the metal detector that all pa**engers on Foreign and domestic flights must walk through I'm sorry Forgive me For all the mean things I said to you You thought I didn't have a temper Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, surprise But I really don't want to see you Dismembered by the marijuana sniffing dogs When a simple little nipping would suffice Would suffice And I'm sorry that I said, "I hope The plane explodes in mid-air As it carries you away from me" And I'm sorry that I said "I hope you break both legs On the mountain while you ski" And I'm sorry for all the nasty things I said about your mother Even though we both know they're true I'm sorry Forgive me I'm swallowing my pride I'd feel so guilty if you died Oh, I'm sorry But I'm still mad at you