Tomato juice and raspberries Carrots, water crescents, celery Immediately on floor five Are you happy, are you learning, are you getting stronger? The Andersons cannot wait a moment longer You better look alive Well life could be a bed of roses If it wasn't filled with so many pricks Who wanna take it out on the bell boy On the bell boy You got fresh towels for 44 You knocked once, then you knocked once more Then you open up the door Mister Mickey, the haberdasher Is laid on a lady and going at her In the middle of the floor Well he just smiled and kept on going I guess it got his juices flowing Playing to an audience of one Putting it on for the bell-boy For the benefit of the bell-boy You didn't even get a tip No, no tip for the bell-boy The bell boy The bell boy bu*terfly steak with baby peas Living on gratuities Living far beyond your means Whatever that means tonight And everybody wants to be cool Buy not everyone can be cool Unless somebody else is there to bring the ice And you provide the ice Because you are the bell boy Such a swell boy The all-is-well boy The I'll-never-tell boy Oh and the evening doesn't pan out right If you peak too soon or you start a fight When someone has to stand between the sh** and the fan That man is the bell boy Give it up for the bell boy Show some respect for the bell boy Make some noise for the bell boy The bell boy, the bell boy I'm talking 'bout the bell boy