(This Track is pure Fiction) I've been teased a few times but it's been reasonable See it's cool, she causes riots when she takes me to school People drool when she's walking past. Before cla** I always laugh As my friends' divorced dads ask her for an autograph On the Streets, cats glance at each other, speak of her Some even ask my mother to sign her dvd cover Everybody knows her, every fella probably owns a Poster of her if he's aged twenty one and over The globe is heavy on her shoulders, she carries the weight Kids get carried away, I couldn't care what they say Cause I don't want another mother, yeah, none can compare She's stunning, she's rare, she's cunning, she's mum of the year She puts men in a frenzy, the pretty woman women envy She's willing and caring with me, she's witty and friendly, I really... Love her cooking but you don't know the half You don't know better than to fantacize about her a**… My Mother's a p**n Star and so what? It didn't change sh** growing up She knew how to raise her boy the right way So f** whatever you may say… My mother's a star, she makes flicks for adults But don't think she don't love my dad. This isn't a joke We've got moral standards, we a normal family Living happily… So f** you and your p**no fantacy She makes s**-tapes and yes, I know they're X Rated But she's never had to be explicit and explain it to me I don't care if she's got a wonderful booty ! What are you on? Truly? I've neber wanted to watch one of her movies ! My mummy ain't some friggin' filthy Hooker But if we looked close at yours, I'm sure we'd fill a book up Mine puts money on the table, while your mother is unable To cope, nasal full of coke, no wonder you're unstable Make your silly jokes, huh, keep up the babbling ! At least mine don't creep around, sleeping with married men She may get nude on the cam, but won't be fooled by a man She'll always do what she can to bring loot to her nuclear fam Chorus +scratches Yeah Women judge each other with a look Men judge a colour and the cover of a book And I judge the judge that judges my mother Yeah, I'm a mother's boy... So reconsider or go f** yourself But don't take it litteraly you dirty douchebag Back the f** off my fam and let us live our normal life. I'ma get back to mine, I've gotta go kid My mum is calling me I've gotta do the washing up Tera Patrick was over for dinner And I'm out. The cognac is waiting… Chorus