Cherry Poppin' Daddies - Mom Was No Fat Broad lyrics

Please note that the russian stuff in the song was left out here since i don't have that character set handy. She said, "it's not drug abuse, They're diet pills," was her excuse Nobody wants a woman with a big caboose." (you must forgive your mom) She cleaned the house in half an hour Mildew didn't have a chance in the shower My mom was always higher than the ol' sears tower (responsibility that sickens your heart) My mom was no fat broad She tied the tubing for a bulging vein Hit that mainer then she sped away Like the white tornado of avenue a (your mother was very unhappy) My mom was no fat broad Oompah doompah doompah doompadee doo Fear of bulbous rollin round lookin like augustus gloop It's the runway model vogue That made my momma swallow you Momma's little helpers got her mind crazy singin' the blues She kept her stash on top of the fridge I tried to flush it down the toilet one time I was six I still remember the fit that she pitched My mom was not fat...she was nuts. They took the gurney down the stairs and the policeman said That i could ride with him in his front seat He said, "my little man, your mom is at peace." My mom was no fat broad