Caustic (Battle Rapper) - Dizaster vs Caustic lyrics

[Round 1: Caustic] First of all, he's gonna spit a bunch of bars he had for this guy Dirt And after that corny sh** he's probably gonna freestyle about my hat or my shirt And that sh**'s cool and on the average fan it might work But let's discuss your f*ggot a** life first Listen up herpie dick I am not QP or Jerzey Swift Save your f**ing Dirt bars you will not do me dirty b**h You're f**ing-trying to get on me like I'm on some unworthy sh** The sad part is you're probably gonna stalk Murda Mook until you're 36 I am whiter, than the flags you use to surrender I am tighter, than the Locksmith bars you should've remembered I over viewed your Al-Qaeda application and you can't be a member Because Lebanon is the only Arabic country that does not have a desert Look, he's trying to intimidate me with some kind of crazy d**h stare And it's working cause your eyebrows look like Zangief's chest hair You sweat so much I think I've discovered why You thought it would be a good idea to grow a mustache above your eyes I met your girl outside For a skinny chick she's got some thunder thighs I'll make that chick say "hi" to my dick like a Chris Brown double time I don't wanna f**ing freestyle, but I have to guys Cause he f**ing reminds me of the Snapple guy The f**ing-your giant dark eye sockets have grown to a raccoon size Which is probably the only way you'll ever see the world through a black dude's eyes He's already pulled the sh** before Y'all remember Vision? Acted like that sh** was short notice with some sh** that was already written Well, I'm expecting some generic disses, so let's get technical with him My incredible writtens will have you in a paramedics equipment Hoping you're f**ing dying like you just got sentenced to life in prison Your f**ing eye-off the head I will rip him If my Beretta clips him you'll be a f**ing vegetable living brain dead like Jessica Simpson This is not Above The Rim or whatever stupid 2Pac movie that you pretend that you live in If it meant that you'd fit in, you'd probably forget your terrorist mission and tell us you're Christian You will not go H.A.M. on me b**h it is against your religion But I've already accepted tradition And when you're dead I'll put a sheet over your head like the rest of your women You rap, like you forgot your meds and you're tripping So go get a prescription from a demented physician You got a f**ing problem with chemical mixing You got a heavy addiction You got a chemistry set in your kitchen You're basically a meth-amatician f**ing p**y f**ing-leave your girl around me, that f**ing s*uts getting raped And since she looks like a donkey Right before I finish I'm punching her in the face You spit your vicious lines around winter time Cause when all the white kids got presents it made you sick inside So when you wanna diss a guy because his skin is white You just sound really pissed off about Christmas time You talk a big sh** but you're too b**h to commit the crime You wouldn't shoot a pig if you're f**ing [?] is from District 9 Remember when we went to N.Y.? And Hollow was talking about tapping you in the jaw Yeah, well you stood up to Math and man that took some balls So I gotta give you props man, you were ready to stand against all Even when you had your back against the wall, back against the wall, back against the wall, back wall! (How much time do I got?) Back against the wall, back against the wall, back against the wall! You f**ing...stupid b**h You will f**ing never make it in the music biz So don't ever f**ing call me white, you are browner than human sh** [Round 1: Dizaster] My name is Caustic, I've been wanting someone top tier my whole life For as long as I've been battling So excuse me if I'm a little emotional right now cause I can't believe this is happening I mean this cat has been wanting to battle me for ages So when I heard you were battling with Basic I was like, "Damn, this f**ing cat is racist." I bring nothing but disastrous terror Yeah, you came with a bunch of good lines but you had to sound like me sh** I felt like I was battling myself in the mirror Yeah I got a bunch of white jokes cause white people rub me the wrong way They told me, "Caustic got an album you should let his song play." f** no! I'd rather go in and out of security at the airport all day See my rhyming is perfect and I don't gotta try to rehearse it When you're applying your verses I'm thinking, "Why does this nerd spit?" You should be outside slitting your wrist or screaming, "I hate Lord on a skateboard Trying to curb flip cause your insides are whiter than bird sh** I got a k**er instinct to make sure my enemies don't spit no more You got a k**er instinct too, except the difference yours is intended for strictly a Nintendo 64 You say you getting money, your CD is in the stores Your albums out, you k**ing tours but b**h you live in port Like civilians in Singapore during the middle of a civil war I spit that sh** that make you listen more This ain't a rap battle, I came to strip you for that little b**h that's hidden in your core Man, I can see your future right now trying to get divorced In a civil court cause you caught your b**h having intercourse...with a horse Man, that little b**h's bird chest is riddled with titty warts Probably why she likes to get f**ed while she's getting pissed on by a little midget dwarf So act up...and get split with force Get stabbed up....then get wrapped up like an Egyptian corpse I'll terrorize your studio, beat your f**ing engineer down 'til his ribs are sore And strangle you to d**h with the extension cord that links from your mixing board I'll kick your door down dressed up as a conquistador, equipped with a ninja sword Put your little sister in a figure four Then give her the option to either s** my dick or kiss the kitchen floor She took the dick of course You got the image of a [?] Try to get into a scrimmage with a Minotaur I should k** you for every single time you ever stole a f**ing candy bar from my father's liquor store You have to be kidding me I mean this cat here is k**ing me Looking like a f**ing handicapped aborigine You wouldn't last for a minute in an active vicinity I'm drowning you fast, asphyxiating your a** instantly In an everlasting river of a** kicking delivery I'm past sick I'm 'bout to collapse the facility I was never racist against white people this is what battling did to me So if you wanna get on that bullsh**, get tough and try to scrap with me physically Then you gon' leave this f**ing battle looking like you got into a tackling injury Look maggot It's not the fact you ain't sh** to me It's like, I don't understand how you could battle so viciously when dad looks like a Jake Gallagher mini-me Wait a minute, he has an epiphany You never robbed someone or ever attacked someone viciously The only thing you've ever taken is a f*ggots virginity and it was a tranny named Tiffany I should shoot you in your face to put your fam' out of misery For having a kid who thinks he could actually make it battle rapping in a- f**ing living in this backstabbing industry Yeah I f**ed up But that doesn't change the fact that you're b**hing and your uterus hurts After this, dude bro, we could totally take shrooms and you could tell me how the universe works This sh** is ludicrous I'll aim the thing and shoot at you first Fatally make you bleed til you stain your jeans, boots and your fur sh** is make believe, things you only do in your verse So I'd rather talk about greater things like your girl's beautiful skirt Or the fact that I can blatantly see her b**bs through her shirt When I was barely 16 I put in units of work Way before this fiend knew it was purp' Way before Project Blowed changed their scene and moved to Lemerk He's talking through my sh** cause he's a f*ggot and this sh**'s about to get worse Don't f** me up homie Man, ain't nothing you could say to me or do could be worse I'm sick of this studying voodoo in church Man, you gon' be hanging from a medical noose in a nurse God damn it I almost ruined my verse f*ggot Caustic You look like a child rapist with your receding hair I know I'm judging you by your image this sh** isn't even fair But what about the fact you're trying to drag kids to your secret lair And you keep 'em there? C'mon you can't tell me you haven't f**ed a child man Why you trying to lie fam'? What about that one night stand you had in Thailand? You're trying to cover sh** up You're trying to cover sh** up like my four wives back in Iran Could you imagine being a kid like DNA? Young as him around this dude and all the dangers to his life span? sh**, to get rid of his life I wouldn't even have to shake him with a knife fam' All it would take is a stranger in a white van waving a bag of Lifesavers in his right hand [Round 2: Caustic] You rapping slow huh? I love L.A. but I'm not mad at a free visit The only thing wacker than your cheap gimmick Is the fact that we had to listen to listen to you rap for three minutes You do not f**ing fear me You f**ing-nah you shouldn't But you don't say sh** clearly You wanna know how the universe works? Ask your girl it starts with a big bang theory You wanna make skateboard jokes fine I f**ing get 'em all the time But your b**h must be into skaters Cause she sat on my face and did a nose grind We in southern Cali right? I guess I gotta get on my esse swag Just cause you rap about shooting people doesn't make you less of a f*g You say you got pumps you're probably dressed in drag Don't make me put the Eagle to your center like a Mexican flag Dizaster...needs his mommy Don't make me grab and squeeze the shotty I'll let the metal splash against your body like a Japanese tsunami Absurd is your only groupie How can they be mad at me when you be decapitating marines in your family's home movies (Oh, I'm pissing people off) f** this f*ggots sh** You ain't matching wits with my man*scripts I'll pop outta the darkness with a buck knife on some Rambo sh** So f** a Dizaster If I have to I'll battle Los Angeles and come back to this motherf**er with a distant planets battle ship You're not a f**ing disaster you're an accident Every time you say the words "smash the whip" your dad gets pissed You have never hi-jacked a jet so don't start talking that Iraqi sh** I bet if your girlfriend shaved it into a landing strip You'd probably crash your dick I am from the future demonstrating how to rap correct Non fiction that you haven't read about sh** that hasn't happened yet And in the future, you're still an overrated f**ing battle vet Because labels are like FEMA, they will never write Dizaster checks If there's problems with you and I then you walking into suicide Your dogs will get put to sleep, your llamas get euthanized The shotty remove your mind, your body in suit and ties I might shoot one of your f**ing wives while she's walking to junior high I mean, you a f**ing front b**h You ain't a palming the Ruger type If anything you're probably one of those Call of Duty guys Catch a body and hit the walkie talkie like, "target neutralized." These problems will never die So I'ma put this MC in a box and rip your heart out of your f**ing chest And watch it beat til it stops When this battle's over There should be some kind of ending sequence you watch That says, "You just defeated the queen of Iraq...achievement unlocked." [Round 2: Dizaster] Yo man, I'm not even from Iraq I mean, c'mon I wanna- As soon as I heard him say that I wanted to say something back But that sh** was f**ing wack I can't even rebu*tal that Man, you are part of an embarra**ing rap group Your girlfriend has terrible tattoos That b**h looks like Erykah Badu if she was wearing a fat suit And your parents are wack dude They're on everything from h**n and crack too Anything you can find underneath the stairs or be prepared in a bathroom Apparently that's you The type of guy that will totally go out to the middle of nowhere and take mad shrooms And like totally smootally wear this hat and it's like totally made out of hair from a raccoon You're a f**ing degenerate f*g That sh** you said about putting the piece to my chest like a Mexican flag When you pronounced "Mexican flag" you sounded like your confederate dad Improvise doom, consume flesh to rejuvenate Resume your steps, headed towards d**h trying to recuperate Ain't no telling when the eye in the sky will illuminate You work a 9 to 5 and wonder why I rhyme and I'm moving weight It's time for I to commit a homicide in a neutral state Your whole image been personified as a huge mistake Wonder why he shouldn't f** with I, removing your waist You a guy that wears a size two in the waist Your f**ing crew's a disgrace You dudes are shady Your music makes me wanna abuse and rape a little Jewish baby The fuse of hate? I use them daily I'll use the hate as fuel to make me use your face as a tool to break the rules of safety I'll flip the f** out, I'm going cuckoo crazy I'm hot wiring your new Mercedes I'll flipping out like the white boy from Rampage Run up open fire on a group of ladies Cause you look like you bought your shoes from Macys Introducing Jason, give up your soul, pray to the Mason [?] a new replacement I don't give a f** if it's you or who's in your place b**h You catch two in your frame b**h You and Cortez AKA Julio Iglesias I don't play kid You start yapping outta place then I react like I'm in The Matrix and slap you in your face quick Making your retract your statement faster than you can actually make it I'll take your b*tch and I'll scrap with her naked Then I'll choke slam her back to the pavement And cave man style drag her b**h a** to the basement Hack her and stash her in random places Then wait for her parents to come back from vacation And mail them f*ggots the remaining half of her bracelet Yeah, you act like you're happy but you're not, just f*ggot just take it You're like, "It's only so far that Dizaster can take the sh**." Shut the f** up you asked for this a** whipping, you were acting flirtatious Instead of climbing the ladder like a man and being actually patient You took your first chance to battle Dizaster and you had to just take it f*ggot! You will never get no one that's top tier "C'mon I want someone that's top tier I mean, can you guys not hear, I'm literally about to drop tiers/tears." You have a big a** nose and some long ears You're a redneck whenever he's not near, a cold can of tall beer As far as you wondering why you never got someone that's top tier Cause you spent most of your time mowing the lawn on your John Deere There's nothing you can say to me G-g-g-g-g-getting ready to blast off At the same same same same same time when you're f**ing sweating and t-t-t-taking your hat off Yeah, motherf**er I'm an Al-Qaeda activist, I'll blast you with a rocket So shut the f** up and stare at me like that and keep your hands in your pocket Yeah I'm the mic murderer, might murder ya, lighting you up it's curtains You're light work It's a nice verse I strike first or it's vice versa See me with a f**ing long knife and a white burka See me on sight then I might derka...derka...derka Unlined circuit, clockwork Al-Qaeda insurgents Sliding by customs with a timed bomb tied to my turban Battling Grind Time's Pee Wee Herman Who likes to spend most of his time listening to Sublime and drinking Heinekens with Germans Riding by lurking in a white suburban, 45 bursting And make your whole entire Earth spin like you getting caught in a giant whirlwind And the reenactment of me sliding inside of your girlfriend Yeah, go fu*k YOURSELF This heat is making everybody melt You've been talking about my girl at least she came here with me, where's yours? Probably out there f**ing every else What else? You will never be sick You better run and get your medical kit Long knife sever your head and your dick on some pro feminine sh** I don't need men, I got plenty of chicks That will run up on you fast while you're pumping gas at 76 Punk your a** and have s** with your b**h I can't believe you took that effort to spit that corny a** irrelevant sh** This is you, your chance, I thought you'd be ready equipped Your whole life you aimed for the best and you missed If I was you I would eventually quit Cause all you do is set goals for your life that never get hit Like a celibate chick Your whole life has been one big ecstasy trip Trying to hit me with a disease til you realize the one I got is 10 times sicker than the one you attempted to infect me with This is it I got a couple more words this f**ing match is over You're a f**ing f*ggot poser You just want me to autograph your Dizaster poster You know what? I'ma say more sh** Yeah, cause you said some sh** about the tsunami That's an emotional situation and I don't wanna have to come ruin it Y'all heard about the Japanese disaster and I know what y'all thinking I swear I had nothing to do with it Cause homeboy, here's a reminder If I did have something to do with it then the earthquake would've struck in China Everyday of my life they quarantine me down and force me to hibernate Cause I put lives at stake any and every time that I'm awake California is at risk of me letting off a violent quake Aftershock of seismic wakes striking the coastline a couple of thousand miles away Giving rise to a tidal wave that'll wipe away the whole entire race And submerge the fu*k outta the Hawaiian state Dizaster What the f** is you crazy? I'm known to cause earthquakes I'll turn this place into a Haiti Talk about my eyebrows Talk about the clothes I wear Yeah you can talk about my eyebrows I don't care But as far as my nose hairs You better not go there