Castle - Orientation lyrics

[Intro: Narrator] Veridian Dynamics. We're a family, just like yours. But we don't waste our time throwing leaves around. We put our family to work. We mean real work. Not just eating mush. Our Veridian Dynamic family works for every member of your family. Even the dead ones. And we're working to bring them back and copy them, in case you lose them again. We love our family, which is why we work nights, weekends, and major holidays, because that's when families should be together. Families. Yay Hi. welcome to the family You're here for minimum wage in exchange for your sanity And take orders from tyrants who are stripped of all humanity Just do your job and keep fueling your boss's vanity Are there any questions? Uh, yeah Will you guys screw me on availability? I have cla** in the evening and I'd like to have the energy To stay awake in cla**, and even have time to study But it's fine either way, cause I desperately need the money Good question. Our policy is: "f** you in the mouth." If you need to change your schedule just give your boss a shout He'll blatantly dismiss it, show his a** for you to kiss it And say, "f** you and your cla**, and hope to god you miss it." Kind of figured. I was thinking I should leave this gig alone But the job market is crappy and I still have student loans So forget it. Right before work I'll just get really stoned To deal with the thought that I'll probably always be a drone Welcome, all and say goodbye to your goals! You're here to answer phones while we harvest all your souls! There's a Lovecraftian demon trained to rape and eat it whole! Hope you love getting screwed and taking very little home! Uh, pardon Is there a chance I'll pick up slack for my manager's mistakes With no credit, no bonus, just a dick slap to the face? Ah, good question, and yes oh and if you want respect You'll have to be a male or have a distracting chest If you want to pa** time we have knives in the breakroom To stab your co-workers in the back at your convenience When your manager's around be sure to act like he's a genius If that doesn't work then play tonsil hockey with his penis Yes, it'll be bleak. You'll pray to die in your sleep And casual Fridays will be the highlights of your week And yes, you'll feel like a caged monkey at the zoo But somebody's got to do it, it might as well be...you