Carrie Brownstein & Fred Armisen - Dream of the 1890's lyrics

JASON: Hey Melanie! MELANIE: Hey Jason! I didn't know you were back in LA JASON: Yeah. You won't believe what I saw on my trip MELANIE: Let me guess. In Portland JASON: Yeah, but...here. Follow me. You remember the 90's when everyone was pickling their own vegetables and brewing their own beer? People were growing out their muttonchops and waxing their handlebar mustaches? MELANIE: The 90's? JASON: Yeah. Everyone was knitting and sewing clothes for their children. People were wearing gla**es all the time like contact lenses had never been invented MELANIE: Wait. Are we talking about the 1990's? JASON: No. The 1890's [Hook] The Dream of the 90's is alive in Portland It's the dream of the 1890's in Portland (Micro-brew or die) JASON: Remember when kids grew up to be artisan bakers? Everyone had homemade haircuts and guys shaved with straight razors? MELANIE: I mean I don't remember, I wasn't born. But yeah, I read about it JASON: Belts didn't really exist yet, everyone wore suspenders. Everyone used to carve their own ice cubes MELANIE: I thought that died out 120 years ago! JASON: Not in Portland [Hook] It's the Dream of the 1890's in Portland (My mustache curls are nice) JASON: Remember in the 1890's when the economy was in a tailspin? Unwashed young men roamed the streets looking for work? And people turned their backs on huge corporate monopolies and supported local businesses? MELANIE: I thought we had to support corporations, I thought they were too big to fail JASON: Well in Portland, people raise their own chickens and cure their own meats! [Hook] The turn of the century is alive in Portland (Welcome to the sausage party) The skinniest strongman is alive in Portland MELANIE: So from what you're saying it's like President McKinley was never a**a**inated. It's as if the 20th century never happened! JASON: Exactly! MELANIE: People took street cars. They rode inconvenient gearless bicycles that hurt your back! JASON: Yeah! [Bridge] It's a long way back And this horrid world has gone off that track But you can escape it all in Portland A dandy hobo has a home in Portland It's the Dream of the 1890's in Portland (Melanie enters dancing decked out in 20's fashion) MELANIE: Hey! JASON: Hi. What are you doing? MELANIE: The Charleston JASON: Stop for a second. It's the right idea but you're kinda, maybe a little too 1920's MELANIE: Oh... JASON: (Props a derby hat on Melanie's head) There we go. Give you one of these. (hastily gives Melanie an anchor tattoo on her arm) Much better. Welcome to Portland MELANIE: Thank you [Outro/Hook] It's the Dream of the 1890's in Portland