Canis Major - Through to You (Beyond the Blue) lyrics

[Verse 1: Lloyd Maz] It's hard to wake up when you live a life you never wanted You love to dream but when you sleep those dreams are very haunted Always knew you had a gift but you would never flaunt it If this is life, you can have it back cause I don't want it How can I be a shadow all I wanna do is shine Wanna feel the very high I dream about trapped in my mind But these are just words on a paper to you You don't realize that I bleed these words to get me through To get me to, the place there where I... laid with you When we were two.....but now that's through... And I can see so clear now what I'm supposed to do... Beyond the blue... [Verse 2: Lloyd Maz] Everybody thinks they know the man behind the music Stereotypes of another boy they love to use it And they abuse it.... Are you not capable of thinking for yourself and seeing that I'm not an evil person... My intentions are nothing but good I had it rough, I didn't live a warming childhood I'm not another cheating ba*tard looking for some action I'm just allergic to a diseased world, and had a bad reaction I was exposed to the truth, before I learned to cope All my life was treated like a dope... a loss of hope So I found comfort within a rope....then I began to choke... [Verse 3: Lloyd Maz] But I made it out to see another breathing day Something inside told me to walk away and find my strength How can you die before you find what you've been looking for And abandon those, inside their eyes, your life they do adore The gift of life, it doesn't come with a revolving door If you were to leave, you weren't the only body on that floor It's not all about you, there's so much more There's so much for, the people who, love you for.. you I never meant to seem like I'm that selfish I've spent a lot of time in my life feeling lost and helpless I've spent a lot of time in my life thinking is it worth it I've felt tired of the pain, and how it feels to hurt it I've felt pissed off living this life when I know my purpose I've seen people my age living their dream, and I was sure to curse it I've spent a lot of time in my life thinking is it worth it.. And I still do....beyond the blue