C-Reezy - Alpha lyrics
[Friend] So Is everything In your Life Okay? [C-Reezy] What the f** do you think? Where do I begin all the time I spend is in my room All alone with no friends To hang out with on the weekend, cause I'm boring and I know I am Thats just me, my life is always this way and there's always so much that i want to just say My mom always yells at me for my grades and I wanna hang out with my girl everyday But sh** doesn't work out as well as it should, and I know I'm lazy not working hard like I could But theres always some fear of rejection in my life I'm a failure I guess until the day I die Or maybe someday i can redeem myself if I really try Somehow I can rip the wings out my back and fly To the highest parts inside my mind I'm always so nice and so damn kind Wake up press snooze on the clock Make sure the time's right on my watch Get dressed, not feeling the best But thats just the life of a kid who's depressed I walk to my bus, not giving a f** Get to school with a mind that doesn't know trust I see my girl, I wonder if she really even likes me I don't know and I don't see why the girls even wanna try me I'm lame, I draw cartoons, and I read comics I don't have much going for myself and I'm just do behind man [Friend] Then get you shirt together Chris, it shouldn't be that hard Sure life is always tough, sometimes you get pushed you're smart You got this in the bag, I know you you're a good guy You're not alone everyone I know kinda has a bad life [C-Reezy] f** that, I'm not supposed to feel this sad Everyday I wake up I'm either mad or sad Why can't I be the old Chris who used to smile all the time The kid who showed off his work, and was proud of the life He lived, oh what i would give to get back to that happy sh** Before all the demons and depression with the slitting wrists I'm tired bro, physically mentally it's all insane I have too many thoughts always going through my brain My mom's always b**hing at me like I'm a problem She has hers she has to deal with and I can't solve them I can barely help myself, let alone my family I'm trying so much so hard I want to start traveling [Friend] To where? you have anything in mind? Do you really wanna go the rapper route in life? You can do so much chrism you can be an architect You can be a awesome lawyer, you just haven't tried it yet [C-Reezy] What the f** no, don't you get it? I'm just trying to be me The young and wild kid, I wanna live my life free Wanna be a an artist out there expressing My thoughts into songs with my feelings I'm sad, yes, everybody knows that now I have my bad days when I'm always looking down I wanna be different when i come up with these sounds But when I'm serious people look at me like a clown When I go to school people always make fun of me I don't get what the f** is so f**ing funny I'm just a kid, sorry I'm not the norm Ive been this way since the f**ing day I was born If I could change the way I am I would do it To go through all this daily sh** is bullsh** Kiss my a** f** it all, none of my friends want to call I never hang out, I don't see flicks I don't get numbers, I can't get chicks So what the f** am I supposed to do as Chris? [Friend] Maybe if you were more fun like your friends you'd get accepted And they're probably just joking no need to be offended You're the one who's putting himself out there So you can't be alone and always scared This demon stuff is just a phase Every teen goes through it in they're own way Don't feel left out or neglect It's not that serious and don't forget You're young have fun like you're supposed to You wanna leave the house sometimes don't you? I guess I let my feelings get the best of me There's a lot in this world and the rest I see Is the part inside my mind thats just reset ling To the darkness and I can't be happy With how things are i wanna f** change I want people to think I'm cool not strange I want girls to think I'm cute, and not think I'm lame I wanna be famous and be in the rap game Get a car get a license I mean I'm already 18 When comes the day when people appreciate me I guess I have to wait, just a little longer And k** off the demons so they don't get stronger I'll try to get my sh** together more Hang out with more friends, bust down mental doors I make these barriers around the smiles and the laughs Too tired of the hate the neglect and the sad I don't want the day to come where the option I lose it To be genuinely happy so f** it gonna choose it To be the better guy, to finally mature To figure out things so I can be sure [Friend] There you go...you got it. You just need to relax and stop worrying so much You got everyone you need, and if you need some more time, you can always talk to me I'm always here for you, and If I can't make anything clearer You always have someone...just look into the mirror