Buster Poindexter - The Worst Beer I Ever Had lyrics

After working all day I head to the bar My friends are all there and oh, how witty they are We talk of the events of the day Until we invariably say GROUP: How dare you treat us this way (Spittoon sound effect) This is the worst beer that I've ever had The worst beer that I've ever had It's so abominably bad it would make a gay man sad It's the worst beer that I've ever had I've traveled all over the world I've sipped a porter in every port of call I've had Sapporo in Japan, that strange exotic land Served in a chilled bottle or a can I've had Red Stripe in the Jamaican sun Served alone or with a jug of white rum I've had the Pilsner Urquell brewed in a former communist hell But this stuff's not fit for a bum I've imbibed a Newcastle Brown It's the only way to bear that old town I've had Fosters down under that would make an abo chunder And tie his kangaroo down In Ireland the Guinness is stout They say it's the cure for the gout By the holy dad, are you congenitally mad? This is the worst beer that I've ever had This is the worst beer that I've ever had The worst beer that I've ever had It's so abominably bad it would make a gay man sad It's the worst beer that I've ever had (Spoken) BUSTER: America's favorite talking drummer, Tony Machine! GROUP: Look at that caveman go! (Singing) Beer comes in all forms and sorts Six packs, barrels and quarts You've got your Pilsner, your lager, your hearty old ale By comparison, this stuff fails! In Milwaukee I once took the tour I fancied myself quite the connoisseur Until the tour guide, he said, "I think you're ready for bed" I said, "good man, I've only had four" GROUP: Four beers BUSTER: Look who's talking GROUP: Ave Maria In Texas the lone star is cool And cowboys ain't nobody's fools And they get off of their horse and drink with such force They eventually fall off of their stools This is the worst beer that I've ever had The worst beer that I've ever had By the holy dad, are you congenitally mad? This is the worst beer that I've ever had California is sunny and fine (Fer sure) But they're obsessed with domestic white wine The denizens, I fear, won't drink enough beer But I really can't blame them this time This is the worst beer that I've ever had The worst beer that I've ever had It's so abominably bad it would make a gay man sad It's the worst beer that I've ever had Sing hearty (The worst beer that I've ever had) Sing lustily (The worst beer that I've ever had) Has the Orwellian prophecy finally come to this Have they actually got us drinking...(Schlitz?) (Spoken) I don't do blue This is the worst Unequivocably Indisputably Irrevocably the worst Beer that I've ever GROUP: Had! BUSTER: Sweet Adeline!