Bender (Battle Rapper) - Illmaculate vs Bender lyrics

[Round 1: Bender] Now he wrote some extra raps to switch the limits and mess around Thinks he set a trap on some last minute trick to extend the rounds I expected that So let him rap You gon' get your wish now anyhow Get ready Mac They can call you my British mistress, when I spread you out in a second flat Now at first I thought I f**s with dude this youngins cool he greezy when he spit He got that hungry proof yet bu*ter smooth I'm feelin' that he's slick So I took a couple views to study you and realized that your gift Is nothing new you just make what you do look easy cause it is Listen Got around to watching my last video Guess now you're gonna say that was a pity vote I can picture folks at home face palming like "Oh that's rich Illmacs here to learn us on some grown man sh**." So how's this He gets a Too Short t-shirt every Christmas, he's a tad fed up I heard the doctor diagnosed him with crib d**h at his last check up He needs water wings when he wants a drink at the washroom sink when the man gets up In the night And rides a golf cart around the mini putt course...that's messed up See you ain't amounting to sh** but a mountain of sh** and you ain't been valid in this since 2006 So we can get this solved tonight and you can call me Walter White Cause I can have you all on ice without an ounce of that gin My last performance? AGL Should show the kid some respect Cause most would agree that I beat myself so really that's my biggest win yet And I can count the opinions I give a sh** about on my dick So in the end I'm still king and that chains a trinket at best Get initials stitched in your chest like official Mitchell and Ness While I hit your ribs with my fist with a vicious ripple effect Won't be talking 'bout escaping no polygamist sect When a compound break makes your collarbone stick out your neck And he's always stretching bars to compensate Cause his body was formed in the proper proportions This became obvious in the washroom before this When he caught my performance Glancing at me pissing like..."God that's enormous I never saw that in Portland" I didn't have the heart to say that's just the top of my foreskin, He called it a "horse dick" You ask if he's a virgin or not, he will totally avoid it If you heard that Mac was working abroad, he had overseas employment Now you got 2 or 3 minutes before the heat I drop next So go cop my f**ing album...flightdistance.net [Round 1: Illmaculate] For this entire battle, you're gonna have to come hard So for the rest of this battle: I dare you not to sweat like a retard And lose your breath every one bar Now, some people think you beat Sketch Menace You did, I can not front on him I got a lot of dope lines for you, and that's not one of them Last time I was in Toronto for a peaceful weekend Getting high with spade, at the theater, chiefin' At least I think, I mean, we was drinkin'? Which seems convenient Cause either I'm mistaken, or there were scenes deleted Reason being: we all saw the title taken, and I was thinking "Where was Liam Neeson? I ain't even see him!" Let's just get this title sh** out the way I told him the title's an idle thing It's the mind that's behind the name A promise that tides would change Y'all saw the decline in weight He went to being less chubby, but seeming less hungry It's not an unlikely trait Now, brainstorming the past May warrant me asking if I should blame four minute abs For the loss of his title chain I know he ain't morbidly fat, it's not the topic that I would take But either way, he should've made more of a splash When he flopped and got his title waived I bet you die a bit inside when I remind you of that night Looking this liar in his eyes, I see why at first his title is declined A fight against Tyson in his prime, it's no surprise to me But, really, you probably lost your car title too He have retirement in mind But being the higher driver in his entire crew Went and lost his job title too Now it's stifling his pride every time he gets denied When he tries to get a ride, listen All biases aside There isn't a title that I could use that would apply to you I think blank when describing him, besides that seems great The irony you'll find is "untitled" is the only title he's entitled to Since he plays with the title on the line [Round 2: Bender] Now I never had a chance to make it down to Florida So I brought some Grizzle here to watch the place get out of order I don't need customs for taking out a foreigner Hogtie this mogwai watch this place get out of order Chop his brakes like Dr. Dre head banging off the dashboard I'll then fast forward if I'm smashed 'til his face don't match his pa**port Fresh Coast s**er, you can't escape this house of horror I don't care if you brought Portland, Seattle, and half the state of California Standing waiting round the corner That pig you trying to wife up, she fed up with your boring flow She's the sorta hoe you find Monday morning on the Maury show, I'm sorry bro Your shorty goes to glory holes in poorly woven orgy robes Of course he knows how the story goes when she's snorting blow And cracks a forty o Ness and Marv got her horny forming an Oreo They lining for days And if Corey Charron ain't hit her with a p**no load then he lied to my face She's the fattest thing to ever get down low on a stripper pole Hell, she even rocked that leather snickers coat from the smell ya dick video He keep her dipped out, really though She gets a nice deal He'll take her shopping for anything she wants, as long as it's not a pair of high heels And I'll be the first to acknowledge I felt your earlier projects But you dumbed your sh** down, and that's some curious logic When you see your greatest strength as a curb to your progress And the chance is if you pander you could firm up your pockets To be perfectly honest I thought you thirsted for knowledge So when I heard the sh** you working on, it churned up some vomit Now you got the nerve to think you deserve some currency off this? Well go ahead and try converting Mohammed Cause that's a more likely chance of you turning a prophet (profit) And while you're at it, go pitch to a label I don't care how many peeps he knows or CEO's that sit at that table He can't get ahead (a head) with connections cause you he looks a Mr. Potato Ask this guy how many compliments, lies and empty promises It took to buy The bulk of all those lines from emcee goddess with Everyone's always telling me that 'Mac is so deep But when you're standing at 3 feet how deep could you actually be? I told y'all I'd beat deep blue in three moves Camouflage your strength, that chess game is see through Your whole f**ing style is preschool No wonder pedophiles get a sweaty mouth when they see you You've kept this format fresh, as a Jordache fest Retreat to Norad, this is where your war path ends And take cover when my swarm catch wreck And stay put or we gon' have your face looking like a Rorschach Test Illmaculate Lil' sack of sh** Share your place with Sharon Tate, I k** actresses I will smack this b**h When it comes to p**y I don't p**y foot But your p**y look like it got a Wookie bush with a Snookie puff I got this down to a science f** what you call relevant, I'm going for timeless You a daily crossword, I'm God's word I'm papyrus Set in granite, etched in tablets like ten commandments from the Highest [Verse 2: Illmaculate] To tell the truth, I didn't write Ten Commandments But Toronto weed got me feeling like the highest, so maybe y'all weed is better, damn it This is the worst move that you've pulled in years Think I could be scared? I'll pull his hair Slap him in his face and ask him, "Who you think's the bully here?" I let him crack on my height and I won't listen I'll even act like it's tight and it's so different Till he goes to give me daps and I eye him and cold diss him Then he turns his back and a fan pushes him While I stand behind him and low bridge him Say I switched my style up, like that scheme might've worked When your battle against Scott Free was three times as worse Acting like his heat might've bursted Pull out that big chopper and it's drama that's my green light to murk When I swing on him it'll sting like when a beehive's disturbed Nah, what I meant I'ma take a stick and beat the sh** outta this piñata While he hanging from a tree by his shirt Bully sh** But hold on, let me switch the subject I heard he was in his thirties And that's a topic that I didn't touch yet Figured I'd be more original plus he'd know the sh** is coming So I wrote two rounds out-spitting him Got to this one and figured...f** it! See there's nothing I can't say when it comes to this man's age He's already got one foot in the damn grave So it's no wonder his career's on its last leg Dawg, you are Presence old, so I'm sort of confused I don't know if you have a time portal to use, but what the f**? Was this guy born in a pool of primordial ooze? This dude's wack as sh**, here's a few fashion tips Buy some loose pants that fit And quit trying to show off that new plastic hip With your old a**, you don't wanna go hand to hand Plus your flow trash, mine's so damn advanced I told battle fans "No, cro magnon man don't stand a chance!" sh**, we can talk about your clothes That hip hop goth genre is so dirty There's not an anonymous cla** that could doctor your swag You're gonna have to quit Hot Topic cold turkey I mean, we can talk about the choke How your legacy's coming all unglued Looks like rubbing out to all them Pesci battles Got Pesci battles rubbing off on you And while we're on the topic I may just ruin 'em both Like as far as losses, take this, two in a row And ay b**h, you don't say sh** like y'all do when you choke I dare you to bring up that Old Spice commercial I f**ing dare you We can even re-enact the scene Picture a bathroom setting in HD on the plasma screen I show up like, "Hello ladies, look at him, back to me" Who would you be more likely to oblige if they asked you to have a drink? Look at him, back to me Fellas, reality or the battle scene, who would you rather be? Look at him, back to me And ask yourself, who would have the faster swing uf they actually had some beef? Look at him, back to me Bring up Old Spice or any ad you've seen I'll give you the axe cause I'm a brute When I'm armed and hammered If we have to take it to that degree! [Round 3: Bender] Call this IRS invasion cause no one buys your records Go and wrtie a letter, sign your resignation You trying Bender's patience? Well I'm here to take aim just like a federal agent on that tribe of rebel natives Comprised of seven nations on the pineridge reservation Yes I saw your youtube commercial It was kind of depressing You dressed in drag selling perfume in a desperate cry for attention Puffy little b**h tits stickin out, greasy hair flying Holy sh**...just imagine what he would do for some actual TV airtime Now you've developed a souther drawl as you've evolved into this Beast who'll run up in the crowd and Ben Wallace that sh** All brolic and quick to ball up a first to brawl with these kids And as small as he is, some of you still fall for that sh** Like, "Golly gee wiz, is he a rap nerd that ollies and flips Or is he harder than a clocker on the Baltimore strip?" You choose between A and B whichever column you pick He's never been the genuine had all his followers tricked So when you see the collegene lips on this Hollywood b**h Start to flap better bet your a** it's more false than legit So little Oliver Twist can go swallow a dick And get ready for the next set of balls on his chin So lets revisit that sh** that Arcane said It was you, not Pete, who tried to polly with Twist You begged him for a solid on some knowledge to kick And crawled away with the whole tourney as a result of that tip Now I don't really know what your policy is But that's a b**h move that I ain't really tolerant with Better fall back or crawl back while there's still a pulse in your wrist Your gla** ceiling just cracked and now the walls closing in And it's true Lush and them still owe you for more than a few bucks And cool nuts ain't do much to recoup, you got used up They may have got you supper, and kept your face feeling funny But still played you like a s**er for a great deal of money Picture Drect at his mansion with the revenue he stacked While he's texting you like, "Yeah 'Mac I'ma get that to you STAT." Cause it ain't really nothing to punk you and that's an understatement If 'Mac said he ever pulled a heavy, this motherf**er was chubby chasing So I'd say that it's clear you ain't gettin doe from battle rhymin stepson If you faced all your fears to take what you're owed they'd have your tiny neck rung Trying to make your career is taking its toll you've sacrificed your best ones Cause if I've wasted this year you've wasted your whole adult life and then some [Round 3: Illmaculate] Y'all gonna have to wait for it Make sure that you're f**ing patient This battle was my idea So if I was chubby chasing it's only on this one occasion I mean he talked about the Old Spice commercial I dared him, right? It's all true That commercial and this battle have something in common and it involves you Cause they both involve me taking a f*ggot's wig off when the jobs through See, I'm on some real ill sh**, not the one to play with Treat his head the same as a 40 bottle You know, have it pouring on the pavement And everybody he came with will shortly follow I'm on my k** Bill sh** Trying to use that same "sorry player" corny combo? I'll put your DNA on display like the Maury talk show With a blade that was made by Hattori Hanzo Once my blade is brandished It's bathed in a bath of flames to lash my victims Instigating cataclysms Like if God has something to say to that He can get his angels branded with it I don't give a f** if the angle's sacreligious There's no escaping the wrath that's given It's painful to f** with me and this ain't no sadomasochism Tell me, where'd all the weight go that you're missin'? You probably chain smoke malnutritioned And the yayo that you're sniffin' Is why you make those brash decisions He probably blames those mannerisms on the anglo saxon in him And don't mistake those race jokes for the scapegoat that is isn't I ain't no fascist, pimpin' I'm who they show when Kato's mask is lifted Bruce Lee in plain clothes Get your face broke quick as I get the case thrown f*ggot listen, you wanna tango this ain't no dance you gettin' I bet you figured that, didn't you? Well let's get it cracking, I rigged the package, lit the fuse When it blew, head removed Bender fragments in a bag, limbs attached to tennis shoes They won't even get to wrap the interview With how quick I snatch his silverspoon I'll k** his a**, I'm bananas and you just silverback gorilla food Try to get stupid, mess up one round and you're f**ed Any minor slips, boo him, so when this comes out in a month You'll see why this b**h losing without a run down from the judge It's automatic, cause you don't have the drive to stick to it when it comes down to the clutch I don't see how he inspires y'all Keep in mind he couldn't hold the title long Others rise and fall, I evolve So tonight it's not a fight at all, you vaginal wall soft Far as I can call this the iron jaws Of a lion maulin a china doll, dawg Try me, leave anybody in their bracket exposed Make 'em share caskets with Loe No, this ain't a fair match It's a bare hand versus a bear trap when it's closed You hear that? Your weird a** is a clone Him and Kap Kallous can have a mirror match Why don't you give him that beard back that you stole He said he was St. Peter the gatekeeper Alright, I'm St. Pierre, I punch face features till I break fingers I grace shoulders with great thinkers and gang leaders So if he plotting a Takeover I'm Nas when he made Ether I'll run up on his pig pen while he eating out the trough Feeding on the slop Tell him MTV ain't a fan of you and neither is the Dot Then fill the magazine like the Forbes camera crew and you legally get shot And nah, I ain't name dropping being cheap to get some props But sh**, it's a win-win so ain't no reason I should stop The whole world gets to witness me leave him in a box Malaysia to Phillipines, even Sweden's in the spot Dawg, if we was in Australia I would feed him to a croc' And how sweet is it even the Englishmen will watch As I run up on Big Ben and start cleaning out his clock So in closing I'ma say that you're too weak to battle me And tell that bouncer that was putting hands on me If he's so power hungry he should join the police academy And sh**, he probably did and he might've stayed longer But he got kicked out for taking a nightstick to a f**ing Jay Walker So really, I'ma tell you I have f**ing talent, dawg And if it wasn't for real artists like us That bouncer wouldn't even f**ing have a job