Ben Folds - Errant Dog lyrics

Have you seen that dog? I gotta get him back. I had him tied to a tree, but he keeps getting out. He's probably running loose with the b**hes. And when I catch him, I'll give him some stitches. Oh I love him so much. Oh that stupid b**h is mine. Errant dog! Errant dog! They're talking down at the spa, now the word is out. God damn I look like a tool when he goes running around. I'm gonna take him on Court TV And show the world what he's done to me. I'll drag his a** back home, back where his a** belongs. Errant dog! Errant dog! He's my everything, he means the world to me. He's my hopes and dreams, fungible property. Sometimes I wonder why I put up with his sh**. If I could, I would become a lesbian. I know I said dead or alive, but really dead is fine. Just bring him here. Errant dog! Errant dog!