Asp - Eleison lyrics

I spend my days in self-disdain And I feel so ashamed Because I know that in the end I would do it over again You'd better You'd better done it I can no longer bear this cage That you forged out of lies And I get stronger in my rage Say can't you hear me cry You'd better You'd better done it Why didn't you k** me Why didn't you k** me when you could Why didn't you set fire on my pyre It would have been better if you had k**ed me there and then Why d'you kick me in the stomach in your boots I can neither breathe nor speak I try to protect my face mith my hands But we both know I'm too weak You'd better You'd better done it I don't know if you're still cutting me And if you know that it's in vain I don't know if you're still shouting at me Can't hear anymore feel no pain You'd better You'd better done it Why didn't you k** me Why didn't you k** me when you could Why didn't you set fire on my pyre It would have been better if you had k**ed me there and then Is it wet because you spit on me Or is it blood that I spat out Will you stop just for a while Please tell me do I still smile Do I cry or am I laughing out loud I wonder if you're still cutting me And if you know that it's in vain It doesn't matter that it hurts I cannot understand the words No matter how you cry or shout I feel no pain And I feel nothing but grief And the fear of seeing you leave And the shame of knowing I would do it over again