Yo, I'm the Duke of the Grill
And you're about to learn some grill sk**s!
So let's get busy, come on let's go!
[Dance routine]
Now working the grill, Bill, it ain't so tough
But first of all you gotta check your stuff
Like the grill that's set at 2-5-0
With the meat and cheese that's ready to go
A towel to keep your station looking cool
But most of all you gotta have your tool!
[Spatula guitar solo]
Are you with me now? Get ready!
We're gonna lay it down!
Now the meat's got grain to it, just like wood
You've gotta follow the arrows and lay them down like you should
From the front to the back, you've gotta lay it down
Space them evenly, not scattered around!
Next, you've gotta salt the meat
From the back to the front and make the taste complete
Not to little, not too much
With a little finesse, you'll get the touch!
[Salting meat]
What's coming up next is our key to success
We'll turn the meat and do a four-corner press
Don't wait too long, I emphasize
Or the meat won't reach the proper size
When things start to sizzle, you're ready to go
Gently turn the meat, but don't be slow
Just turn them over, easily
We don't want a broken patty, that's a guarantee!
Press out the corners 1-2-3-4!
Rock it a bit, are ya keeping score?
Top to bottom, left to right
And you'll get a patty that's outta sight!
Press out the corners, nice and wide
'Least half an inch on both sides
The reason you press, you gotta think
When the meat hits the grill they start to shrink!
(We start shrinking, when we hit the grill, you know we will!
We start shrinking, when we hit the grill, you know we will!)
(Aooowwww!)
When you see red juices on the top of the meat
It's time to give it a turn, and press and repeat!
Do it again, just like you did before
Do the four-corner press just one time more
Now, once you press it the second time
Don't press 'em again cause the meat's just fine
But when you see red juices rise
Turn the patty over to the other side!
Don't scrape the grill, we want it wet you see
It keeps the meat moist, so it's hot and juicy!
When the meat's red juices no longer rise
You can serve that patty, and you'll win a prize!
[Gold medal with fanfare]
It takes about four minutes to cook
But just to make sure, you can have a look
Use your tool, and double-check
It should be grey and moist, to be correct!
An order's placed--you're ready to go
Drain the meat, just like so
Once the draining is totally done
Place the patty squarely on the heel of that bun!
Now there you go, Billy, you give it a shot!
Don't be afraid, I think your gonna be hot!