[Brandon Mychal Smith]
Uh, so you're a rapper now? Oh, uh okay
Here we go again
Prepare to meet your end
Just looked you up on Facebook
You have 0 friends
This kid's a loser, yo
He ain't even kissed a girl
You write her love letters
I buy her ice and pearls
So how you like me now
Even Roxanne's in the background saying
"Wow! Bling's got style!"
I'm off the gold chain
If you're a rapper why is Kris your backup dancer
Like an extra on Soul Train?
I see your mommy and your daddy in the front row
They must be embarra**ed for you bro
You're not a real MC you should quit hip hop
Now be a good bus boy and go get your mop
[Tyler James Williams]
Bling, you don't wanna battle
You're the snake without the rattle
You're the boat without the paddle
You're the duck without the waddle
You're the horse without the saddle
The ranch without the cattle
The day without the shadow
Son I think you should skedaddle
Kick gravel
Sayonara punk, arrivederci
What language do I have to say it in
For you to hear me clearly
Adios amigo, you're over with finito
This clown couldn't rap anything but my burrito
[Brandon Mychal Smith]
Kid you have to hold your mommy's hand before you cross the street
You have to sneak out the house just to clean and sweep
And now you look queasy I made you go mute
Put your camera phones up so you can post this on YouTube
Truth's gotta screw loose
He's terrified to bust
So lightweight I can blow him over with a gust
You're weak like 7 days, you deserve boos
You should walk around in some high-heel shoes, ha!
You should rock pigtails and a skirt
You're shaking in your boots
Are your feelings getting hurt?
Well maybe I should hurt more than your feelings
Maybe I should rip the roof off the theater ceiling
Maybe you should start kneeling
His eyes are getting misty
You're so wack if you were me you couldn't diss me
Kissy kissy Roxanne did you miss me
I'll take you out to dinner after I've eaten this pip squeak
And when we're on vacation I'll let him house sit
Here's a couple bucks
Buy your self a better outfit
[Tyler James Williams]
You know what?
You don't have a stack of cash or a flashy pad
I saw you last week driving a taxi cab
Your secret's out and now they know, sport
We'll call you if we need a ride to an airport
In fact, you can drop me off at home after this
And you can take your couple bucks back but as a tip
You're playing yourself like solitaire
Telling everyone here that you're a millionaire
You're not a baller you're a phony
I bet your whole crew was a bunch of rent-a-homeys
And now you lay in bed lonely
Your persona's a facade
The only girls you get are in the pages of a catalog
Here stands Lord of the Bluff
His lies were legendary till the Truth made him hush
And what's funny is your truth is enough
Why'd you have to make up all the money and stuff
I guess it's easier to play the role and act hard
Cause you don't have the guts to tell us who you really are
So you can keep a trophy that you don't deserve
I might be a bus boy but you just got served