You're lighting pencils on fire and trying to stickem in the rug
And Joey said he caught you drinking Janitor in a Drum
Then you tied up the mailman and took him to the vet
If I didn't know you better, I'd say that you were upset
Now Peggy called me crying after you whipped her with a sponge
I came over to find you naked in a bed of egg foo young
You said "Get back in the shoebox my little turtle pet"
If I didn't know you better, I'd say that you were upset
Don't turn on the oven and put your head inside
It's not really as bad as it seems
Whatever's happened, whatever's not right
Will someday disappear just like a bad dream
Now your scalp's a little bloody and the bathtub's full of hair
When you go off the deepend you sure do it with a flair
I see you turning catatonic on the balcony up there
Then you put on a headdress as you bounce down the stairs
Saying "I'm gonna give you something you never will forget"
If I didn't know you better, I'd say that you were upset