When I were a lad I were so glad to go out in the daytime
With me fork, and a bottle and a cork to help out in the haytime
A- tossin' hay upon the mow, met young Lucy Bailey
Zaid, "My dear, are you often here?", she said "Yes sir, twice daily"
We had such fun in the summer sun, Lucy were so thrillin'
Sweet and pure but I weren't sure that young maid were willin'
Till one day among the hay we was working gaily
She up's and slips, zummat rips and I went there twice daily
(Oh 'Ow I did too)
She said "Dear, I do feel queer, think I oughta tell 'ee
Taint new bread," she sadly said, "a-swelling up me belly"
Oughter go to Doctor Joe", off she went so gaily
He gave a dollop of a girt thick jollop, zaid take this twice daily
( 'Orrible stuff twere )
Now Lucy's dad were very mad, chased I 'round the hay mow
Said "My son, you've had your fun, the time has come to pay now.
My girl you'll wed", the old man said, as he waved his shotgun gaily
"If you don't", he said, "I'll put some lead, and you won't go there twice daily!
(Ow painful that )
Well the very next day in the month of May held a ceremony
Paid off the vicar with a gallon of liquor, rode to church on a pony
And the village folks from miles around waved and shouted gaily
There's no doubt you'll get caught out if you goes there twice daily
( They was right too - (I did)
Now to Lucy's joy she had a boy, what a little darlin'
Round and fat as a Cheshire cat, perky as a starlin'
Skin were smooth as a cider jar and they called him Buster Bailey
Fattened on swedes and charlock weeds and a pint of scrump twice daily
( Fat little bleeder too)
Now we'm old, our story's told, been forty years together
And we often stray where we tossed the hay in that old time summer weather
Kids we got full ten or more, we goes on quite gaily
Tho' I'm old and grey, when I gets me way, I still goes there twice daily