[Originally performed by Thurl Ravenscroft] You're a mean one Mr. Grinch You really are a heel You're as cuddly as a cactus And as charming as an eel Mr. Grinch! You're a bad banana With a greasy black peel! You're a monster, Mr. Grinch! Your heart's an empty hole Your brain is full of spiders You've got garlic in your soul Mr. Grinch! I wouldn't touch you With a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole! You're a vile one, Mr. Grinch! You have termites in your smile You have all the tender sweetness Of a seasick crocodile Mr. Grinch! Given the choice between the two of you I'd take the seasick crocodile! You're a foul one, Mr. Grinch! You're a nasty, wasty skunk!
Your heart is full of unwashed socks Your soul is full of gunk Mr. Grinch! The three words that best describe you Are as follows, and I quote "Stink, stank, stunk!" You're a rotter, Mr. Grinch! You're the king of sinful sots! Your heart's a dead tomato Splotched with moldy, purple spots Mr. Grinch! Your soul is an appalling dump-heap Overflowing with the most disgraceful Assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable Mangled-up in tangled-up knots! You nauseate me, Mr. Grinch! With a nauseous super naus! You're a crooked jerky jockey And you drive a crooked hoss Mr. Grinch! You're a three-decker sauerkraut And toadstool sandwich With arsenic sauce!