A pity she does not exist, a shame he's not a f*g The only girl I ever loved was Andrew in drag There is no hope of love for me, from here on I go stag The only girl I'll ever love is Andrew in drag Andrew in drag Andrew in drag Andrew in drag, yeah I don't know why I even went, it's really not my bag Just thought it might be funny to see Andrew in drag The moment he walked on the stage my tail began to wag Wag like a little weiner dog for Andrew in drag Andrew in drag Andrew in drag
Andrew in drag, yeah I've always been a ladies' man and I don't have to brag But I've become a mama's boy for Andrew in drag I'd sign away my trust fund, I would even sell the Jag If I could spend my misspent youth with Andrew in drag Andrew in drag Andrew in drag Andrew in drag, yeah So stick him a dress and he's the only boy I'd shag The only boy I'd anything is Andrew in drag I'll never see that girl again, he did it as a gag I'll pine away forevermore for Andrew in drag