I've always been the guy with the finger in his nose
When the pa**port picture gets taken
When the big guys took me out stealin' chickens
It was me caught holdin' the bacon
When they're droppin' a piano from the 47th floor
I'm the guy underneath lookin' up
And when the tidal wave strikes a hundred miles at sea
I'm always at the rail throwin' up
Whee until Pow!
Somehow I woulda met you anyhow
You fix it up and then holy cow
You folks should oughta see me now....
I was standing in the artsy-fartsy uptown restaurant a few frozen dinners ago
When I stumbled on a waiter full of crepes suzettes
And I ran out the door flambeaux
Then I ran down to Chinatown doused myself with soy sauce
And grabbed some moo goo gai-pan to go
When I got wiped out by a stray bean sprout that was landin' on the floor
Whee until Pow!
Somehow I woulda met you anyhow
You fix it up and then holy cow
You folks should oughta see me now....
Well I finally got so fed up
I was off to blow my head off
With the gun inside the cash box at the store
Then I thought I'd grab a fistful
Just in case I weren't successful
But instead I got my tie caught in the drawer
When you're riding down the road at a hundred miles an hour
And the guy ahead is hitching someplace
Honey don't you be surprised I'll be wiping out my eyes
If you pa** me leaving dust in my face
Whee until Pow!
Somehow I woulda met you anyhow
You fix it up and then holy cow
You folks should oughta see me now....
Whee until Pow!
Somehow I woulda met you anyhow
You fix it up and then holy cow
You folks should oughta see me now....